What small acts of pettiness actually bring you great joy? – 19 impressively petty suggestions

Poke Staff. Updated October 16th, 2022

A Redditor named u/Mabelmudge took to r/AskUK to find the answer – or answers – to this question –

What small acts of pettiness actually bring you great joy?

They had their own contribution to get the ball rolling.

‘I put back a Jamie Oliver sauce in Tesco the other day once I realised it was one of his. The sneaky bugger had changed his branding and he almost had me fooled. Not today Jamie!’

My old boss wanted everything in Arial. When I was made redundant I changed the default template to Calibri. He’s too incompetent to change it back.
MonkeyHamlet

I will never buy The S*n, but I will hide them behind other papers in supermarkets.
Mattyla666

I work in a coffee shop. When people are rude (order while on the phone, don’t say hello etc) I give them decaf. I know that coffee will do nothing for you and that gives me such joy.
pd6128
Via

Glass-Palpitation133

On YouTube when an unskippable ad comes on I purposely look away. Shan’t be watching, thank you very much.
ArtyPineapple

We have shared laundry machines that 6 apartments use. Someone leaves their clothes in the drier for days at a time. Every time they do I throw one of their socks in the bin.
kbbox

If I see someone standing on the left of the escalator on the Tube I walk down and loudly say “excuse me, can you stand on the right, thank you” and make them move so I can keep going. Even if I didn’t intend to walk in the first place.
ArranMammoth

Secretly (or mentally if people can see me) sticking my middle finger up at any billboard or bus advert that advertises GB News.
Mbew_Mot

I take time out of my every day to find that “Reject All” button on website cookie requests.

Not getting my data if you’re going to purposely make the reject button 3 clicks further away than the ‘Accept All’.
SantinoLoSpecchio

10.

I used to do a lot of email based work, and regularly enjoyed dropping the “Kind” from my “Kind regards” signature when someone was being a bellend and I had just put them in their place.
AmePartyPirate

11.

On Instagram, I follow all the Kardashians except Kim. I like to think she’d hate it.
BaronSamedys

12.

MrsBookish
Via

13.

Mowing the lawn at 6am when my neighbours were having a very loud house party till the small hours a couple of years ago was very satisfying.
KingJacoPax

14.

Loudly saying ‘you’re welcome’ to people that haven’t acknowledged I’ve let them through a door or held it open for them.
TheKnightsRider

15.

When people leave their trolleys in the middle of supermarket car parks, I kindly point out the area you’re meant to return them to.
EyChuparosa

16.

There’s a big monolith TV advertising display board in the lobby of my office. God, I enjoy making it face the wall. It gets turned back once a month or so and I love performing my adblock services.
Guy72277

17.

87LonelyGirl
Via

18.

When we were married I used to take a sip out of my ex-husband’s drink before giving it to him, he would always take a gulp and proclaim ‘the first sip is the best’ – used to give me a sense of satisfaction knowing I had the first sip & he didn’t know.
NoBreakfast3243

19.

Pressing the button for the crossing after I’ve crossed. 1 point per car, 5 points for a van or flashy car, 10 for a lorry or bus that stops! I’ve had 6 cars stop before!
Mrslinkydragon

BONUS

u/MartinBagley had a gardening confession.

Lobbing snails 🐌 over the fence into my shitty neighbour’s veg patch gives me great joy.

We endorse this response from u/2maa2.

Are you sure they’re the shitty neighbour?

Source r/AskUk Image Screengrab