Vaccines, tests and more – 13 lockdown laughs

In spite of the gloomy headlines and continuing lockdown, people have still managed to think of some very funny, if accurate, things to say about the pandemic.

These are our favourites.

1.

Bit surprised that people are surprised by the idea schools may not be back mid-Feb after all. This is not our first rodeo, people. We have experienced the Boris Johnson Overly Optimistic Deadline Phenomenon before.

— gabyhinsliff (@gabyhinsliff) January 13, 2021

2.

Wonder how many times Boris Johnson has asked his advisors "what if we just gave them a quarter of the vaccine for now?"

— HappyToast ★ (@IamHappyToast) January 14, 2021

3.

Ok I'm just checking, does a U in my Biology A-level count as a negative test?

— Chris PG 🌈 twitch.tv/ThatChrisPG (@chrispurchase) January 15, 2021

4.

It can be a bit upsetting when Facebook memories shows you on a fab holiday or a wild night out or some other activity that is now forbidden and much longed for… but don’t worry, it won’t be long before we start getting Facebook memories of Lockdown 1 to keep our spirits up!

— Dave Gorman (@DaveGorman) January 16, 2021

5.

itv doing a doc about covid called The Virus That Shook The World like it still isn’t….shaking

— Mollie Goodfellow (@hansmollman) January 16, 2021

6.

Wife getting her vaccine today, would you judge me if I tried to suck it out of her arm

— James Felton (@JimMFelton) January 17, 2021

7.

The key to making each day in lockdown feel like it has purpose and shape, is to break it down in to segments. So this morning, for example, I shall be doing 'fuck all', this afternoon 'sod all', and this evening will exclusively be given over to 'bastard bugger all'. A full day.

— Chris Lang (@ChrisLangWriter) January 17, 2021

8.

TGI whatever day it is

— Danny Wallace (@dannywallace) January 15, 2021

9.

Waiting outside the supermarket with all the other weaker partners from couples doing the big shop

— Zoë Tomalin (@ZoeTomalin) January 8, 2021

10.

I’ve decided that once all this is over I’m gonna be the sort of person who shows up at parties with a sack of cheeseburgers or nuggets or tacos and goes “dinner’s on me, gang”

— AK Lingus In Cartoon Form (@aklingus) January 17, 2021

11.

Not saying I’ve turned into a slob in lockdown but I’ve started referring to having a shower as “make over time”

— Gráinne Maguire (@GrainneMaguire) January 18, 2021

12.

We’ll all start looking like Robert Smith by the time lockdown ends pic.twitter.com/25bfWpa7og

— Paul (@bingowings14) January 17, 2021

13.

Yeah the pandemic is anxiety inducing but remember when you’d accidentally open the internet on your flip phone?

— Megan Gilbert (@meegangilbert) January 15, 2021

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Image Medakit Ltd and Amin Moshrefi on Unsplash