Our 25 Favourite Funny Tweets of the Week
In case you were wondering what all that tinsel and chocolate is doing in the shops, it’s nearly Christmas – and this is the last Tweets of the Week before the big day.
The standard is as high as ever. This is no Friday afternoon job, apart from the fact that it is literally a Friday afternoon job, obviously.
If you spot any new people you find funny – give them a follow.
1.
i think i understand why rhinos are going extinct pic.twitter.com/oH5yDKoOKo
— Uncle Duke (@UncleDuke1969) December 15, 2022
2.
Maltesers biscuits. Man alive. I'm not necessarily saying they're moreish, but their price is displayed as a "street value" in Sainsbury's.
— Jason (@NickMotown) December 11, 2022
3.
Ok, that seems pretty secure. No one’s stealing THIS fence. pic.twitter.com/hLAZ3vLBED
— Moose Allain Ꙭ (@MooseAllain) December 11, 2022
4.
“That’s not a pipe. THIS is a pipe”
Crocodile Magritte
— Sanjeev Kohli (@govindajeggy) December 11, 2022
5.
It's like Fred West complaining about an uneven patio. pic.twitter.com/EreW1uBKnr
— Andrew Brooks (@taxbod) December 12, 2022
6.
As usual, nothing appropriate for my nephew, Toblerone. pic.twitter.com/Ztdx7qwATh
— Festive Peter MᶜNamara (@McNamaraPD) December 10, 2022
7.
There is no noise louder than me doing a job I asked my husband to do
— Joanna Hardy-Susskind (@Joanna__Hardy) December 11, 2022
8.
Mom: “use yo own money”
Me: pic.twitter.com/fo4DLNGpAa— faith (@faiththegemini) December 12, 2022
9.
Yes, I'm a writer, but my real job is alternating between drinking coffee, drinking water, and pissing.
— Tess Barker (@TesstifyBarker) December 14, 2022
10.
Purfect.. 😅 pic.twitter.com/SxMRxixxvx
— Buitengebieden (@buitengebieden) December 14, 2022
11.
Looking forward to the release of Sam Bankman-Fried, just for the headline BANK MAN BANKMAN-FRIED FREED.
— Tom Hamilton (@thhamilton) December 14, 2022
12.
BRIDE TO BE: Did you pick up the centrepiece like I asked?
GROOM: YES. I'M NOT AN IDIOT
*kicks box of centipedes under sofa*— Craig Deeley 🇪🇺🏳️🌈 🇺🇦 (@craiguito) December 15, 2022
