25 favourite tweets of the week
Welcome to your weekly oasis of funny in a desert of harsh facts. As always, show your favourites some love.
1.
Tsk, tsk, look at all the people on this train, glued to their phones instead of listening to me recite Little Shop Of Horrors from memory.
— Alasdair Beckett-King (@MisterABK) September 17, 2022
2.
Bingo is just a crap data entry job you *might* get paid for.
— Ignacio Lopez (@comedylopez) September 22, 2022
3.
You got your ducks in a row. I got my monkeys in a wheelbarrow. We are not the same.
— Tori (@ToriTheMom) September 21, 2022
4.
This is just to say
I have binned ⁰the plums ⁰that were in ⁰the icebox
and which ⁰you you had forgotten about ⁰when you went on holiday
Forgive me ⁰but sweet Jesus
what the fuck. pic.twitter.com/Bwrpj0kzcc— Michael Moran (@TheMichaelMoran) September 17, 2022
5.
Who’s a good boy, eh? Who’s a good boy? pic.twitter.com/lhRuxXMBPD
— Moose Allain Ꙭ (@MooseAllain) September 22, 2022
6.
We couldn’t just…..find their homes? pic.twitter.com/K7ZXTaIVZR
— MF FairyPrincessSmoo (@Smooheed) September 20, 2022
7.
waitress: what can i get you to drink?
me: house margarita.
waitress: [slowly] margarita good— Ordinary Pumpkin Spice (@OrdinaryAlso) September 21, 2022
8.
My mom making me come say hi to somebody I “knew” as a baby pic.twitter.com/vxPiwmGgPK
— Mickey (@mickeywon234) September 19, 2022
9.
They’re really running out of ideas in this franchise pic.twitter.com/geru7zuMAl
— Dr Adam Rutherford (@AdamRutherford) September 20, 2022
10.
Is there a pill I can take so I don’t have to change my passwords
— Midge (@mxmclain) September 20, 2022
11.
I’ll skip lunch if that’s ok pic.twitter.com/eQ6HaMMRVc
— Paul (@bingowings14) September 21, 2022
12.
don’t drink and ebay pic.twitter.com/0Pqx0Eq0Rf
— Josh (@Joshbal4) September 21, 2022
