The government’s ‘bonfire of the banalities’ train policy is so like The Thick of It it’s uncanny
Because there is clearly nothing more important to do with its time, the government has announced it will cut the number of announcements people hear on trains and railway stations.
Transport secretary Grant Shapps said passengers were ‘plagued by an endless torrent of repeated and unnecessary announcements’ in something he dubbed the ‘bonfire of the banalities’.
But don’t take our word for it, here’s the man himself, in surely the most cringeworthy thing you’ll see this week.
📢 ‘…put unwanted newspapers in the bin…’
This is one example of the announcements that we’re getting rid of, making the passenger experience better and delivering on the Williams-Shapps #PlanForRail.
— Department for Transport (@transportgovuk) January 21, 2022
And it prompted no end of mockery, as you might imagine.
Is this for real? 🤣🤣 https://t.co/FUP8dXjE8W
— Gary Lineker 💙 (@GaryLineker) January 21, 2022
What the heck is this? A waste of taxpayers money on a pointless announcement about “pointless” announcements (apparently). It might be better to concentrate on sorting the network in the north and reducing fares rather than this ego driven claptrap. https://t.co/OCTQ6b5e8C
— Adil Ray OBE (@adilray) January 21, 2022
Perhaps the single most pointless thing Grant Shapps has ever done. In a list that could well reach to the Moon. https://t.co/NLF7oVNyh0
— Otto English (@Otto_English) January 21, 2022
But the best spot – the very best spot – came courtesy of @AdamBienkov.
— Adam Bienkov (@AdamBienkov) January 21, 2022
And finally, not forgetting this very important announcement.
— Accidental Partridge (@AccidentalP) January 21, 2022
Schoolboy error, Shapps.