Rob Delaney asked people for their favourite British insults – 25 of the funniest and most savage

John Plunkett. Updated October 20th, 2021

14.

schooner

— rob delaney (@robdelaney) October 19, 2021

15.

Crisp packet

— Shaun Walker (@sbwalker5) October 19, 2021

16.

Weapon is a compliment. Tool is an insult. “Melt” is my particular favourite.

— Laura Smyth (@thatlaurasmyth) October 19, 2021

17.

Weapon’s definitely not a compliment in Scotland

— Christina (@goodcleantweetz) October 19, 2021

18.

Rocket. And as with all Scottish insults, the ferocity is increased with ‘absolute’

“They are an absolute rocket”

— A.Monolith (@alanmonolith) October 19, 2021

19.

Hoop. ‘You massive hoop’

— Such&Such (@SuchAndSuchDes) October 19, 2021

20.

“Bell end” and “cock womble” are elite

— Leafs are 2-1-1 in 2021/22 (@TheFookinCanuck) October 19, 2021

21.

In Ireland “Wagon” is used regularly, generally towards a “Karen” type person, usually female but not exclusively

— BiggerthanDavebutsmallerthanBigDave Dave (@LittleBigDaithi) October 19, 2021

22.

When I was in Norfolk a couple of insults that made me chuckle were “plank” and “punnet”.

— Yoner Sandison (@AldousGrundy) October 19, 2021

23.

In Scotland we have rocket, nugget, numpty, bawbag, tube, gowk, fud, dobber, bampot, tadger and a variety of other poetic terms

— Al Kennedy (@housetoastonish) October 19, 2021

24.

Geebag
Irish vernacular
Meaning: Ya geebag

— Andrew Maxwell (@andrewismaxwell) October 19, 2021

25.

Wet lettuce

— Rachel Lloyd (@littlelesser) October 19, 2021

Last word to Rob Delaney.

Magnificent responses. I laugh hardest at the most nonsensical ones like “quilt.” The profane/overt ones aren’t as funny to me, w/ the exception of “bell whiff” & (I have to assume) “cleft.” Also I didn’t know “melt” was CRS for “clown”; meltdown->clown. Fabulous.

— rob delaney (@robdelaney) October 19, 2021

And in the unlikely event you don’t already, follow @robdelaney on Twitter here!

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