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Our favourite funny RSVPs to the Johnson-Symonds wedding invitations

Oonagh Keating. Updated May 25th, 2021

The prime minister and his fiancée, Carrie Symonds, have apparently sent out ‘save the day’ cards for their proposed wedding on the 30th July 2022 at a secret location*. We expect ours got lost in the post.

*Presumably, bidding is still open on who gets the honour of donating a stately home for the occasion.

Third time lucky, as they say.

It’s not exactly a shocking turn of events, both because of the dead giveaway word, ‘fiancée’, and the fact that they need something to distract attention from the Dominic Cummings allegations, which include:

Herd immunity was the government’s policy

The PM missed key Covid meetings because he was working on his biography of Shakespeare, in order to avoid returning his book advance, which was crucial to covering the cost of his most recent divorce.

As dead cats go – sorry, Larry – a distant wedding date of a long-engaged couple draws very little attention as it lands on the table.

The row about who footed the bill for the couple’s refurbishment of their Downing Street flat after Carrie declared Theresa May’s style ‘a John Lewis nightmare’, along with recent allegations that the JCB head paid for thousands of pounds worth of takeaways for the couple, prompted speculation about wedding costs.

But the news was the gift that keeps on giving – like a toaster or a Le Creuset casserole dish – and these funny tweeters RSVPED in style.

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