Life

‘What’s the most middle-aged thing you said recently?’ – 27 hilariously tell tale signs

15. ‘I can’t fix one thing in my house without at least 15 minutes of complaining about the previous owners handiwork.’
FistedTate

16. “When you leave a room, turn the light OFF!” I’ve become my dad…..’ TheGoodJudgeHolden

17. “No, I’m okay. It just takes my back a little while to loosen up in the morning.” tenpiecelips

18. ‘In a conversation with a friend “I managed to find a really good knife block recently…” naxxfish

19. ‘My housemate: you want a drink?
‘Me: Nah, man. I haven’t had a drink in… six months maybe? More?
‘My housemate: You stopped drinking?
‘Me: I’m not SOBER or anything, it’s just that alcohol makes me sleepy.’
itcouldbesomuchworse

20. ‘I slapped a crate I had strapped onto the back of my car and said “This isn’t going anywhere” jeezyjames

21. “It’s 8:30pm, a little late to start a movie.” To make it worse, it was a Saturday night.’ sisaacs41

22. ‘When my wife asked if there was anything she need to pick up at the store, and I responded: “I think we’re out of asparagus.” Not sure what foul demon possessed me to to say those words.’
moronomer

23. “I’m so pleased with what a bargain this fleece was.” A) I now own fleeces. B) I really was very pleased. C) it’s a Cotton Traders and I got it for £2 from a charity shop.’ seehowthingsgo

24. “They just don’t make them like they used to” them being good wood dressers.’
CoconutSunshine-

25. ‘Some kids ran through my lawn the other day. I’m still recovering.’
Atrius129

26. ‘I bought a really nice vacuum cleaner and I told 3 friends about it. They were very interested. One of them ask me where and went and bought one, too.’
Competitive_Rub

27. ‘I was venting to a coworker about these noisy bastards living next to me. I actually said the words, “goddamn teenagers and their Bluetooth machines”. I stand by my admonition but man it was my greatest age leap forward since I embraced the sensible Toyota.’
1992_City_Champs

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‘What’s the stupidest thing a man has ever mansplained to you?’ 13 peak mansplainers

Source Reddit u/naxxfish H/T BoredPanda Image Unsplash

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