Simply 28 of the funniest tweets on the highs and lows of parenthood

15.

I don't know why parents complain about cereal on the floor, the crunching sound is a dead giveaway when the kids go into the kitchen to get an unauthorized snack.

— AparnaRC (@Wordesse) March 26, 2021

16.

Ask your kids for help putting the groceries away if you enjoy someday finding a package of cheese under your sink that has last year's date on it.

— Rodney Lacroix (@RodLacroix) March 15, 2021

17.

Yeah, well I got my teenage son to bring dirty crockery down from his bedroom. Your move, scientists. pic.twitter.com/Q1ktLfhzA2

— Amanda (@Pandamoanimum) February 2, 2021

18.

My 4yo asserts dominance by making eye contact while she eats the lunch I just made for myself.

— Professional Worrier (@pro_worrier_) March 15, 2021

19.

Shout out to all the other parents of toddlers who lost one hour of their day when the clocks went forward last night and 4 hours of their evening as getting their kids to bed took most of their lifetime.

— Tiernan Douieb (@TiernanDouieb) March 28, 2021

20.

My 4 year old took 2 hours and 3 separate sittings to eat a slice of cake. I don’t even know who this kid is anymore.

— threetimedaddy (@threetimedaddy) March 30, 2021

21.

Parenting articles always give the most obvious advice: “Trouble getting your kids up in the morning? Put them to bed earlier.” Give me something innovative like “Invest in an air horn. We like this one that has a built-in water sprayer, available at Amazon for $15.99.”

— SpacedMom (@copymama) March 30, 2021

22.

Drinking dulls the senses. That is exactly why I have shots when my kid starts practicing her viola.

— ThisOneSays (@ThisOneSayz) April 7, 2021

23.

Her: How was your day? GET OUT OF THE SHOWER!

Me: Pretty good, yours?

Her: I've had better, had worse too. WHY AREN'T YOU OUT YET?

Me: Same, same. LISTEN TO YOUR MOTHER AND GET OUT THE SHOWER! Wanna order pizza tonight?

— No Pants Papple 🚫👖🍍 (@pantless_papple) April 7, 2021

24.

The good news: 5 can read!!

The bad news: 5 knows I’ve been skipping entire paragraphs when reading bedtime stories!

— Melissafent on the Hillifent (@awkwardenabled) March 5, 2021

25.

The dog died last weekend and my son has been crying his eyes out all week. Does anyone know where I can get a new one in time for Christmas? Preferably one that doesn’t cry so much.

— Ignacio Lopez (@comedylopez) December 18, 2020

26.

Tearful scenes as I picked up my son from nursery for the last time yesterday.
It was supposed to be Tuesday but I forgot it shuts at 4.

— Ben Turner Comedian (@benturnercomedy) August 29, 2019

27.

my son bet me that he could make a piece of paper fly farther than i could so he spent 10 minutes making the fanciest paper airplane i’ve ever seen. the look on his face when i crumpled mine into a ball and launched it across the house was priceless. sucks to be a loser lmao

— cam (@climaxximus) April 14, 2021

28.

I just made my daughter a grilled cheese and her response was “this is perfect, I bet you can’t do it twice” so yes, she knows how to play the game

— Crockett🍀 (@CrockettForReal) January 14, 2021

It’s worth all the hard work and stress when they do something thoughtful though, right?

being a parent can be really hard but one day your kid will do something simple like bring you breakfast in bed and in that moment you'll know in your heart that you have to go and clean the kitchen

— The Dad (@thedad) April 11, 2021

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Parents are sharing the stupid mistakes their kids will never let them forget – 23 funniest

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