This hilarious shutdown of a pyramid schemer is beautifully done

John Plunkett. Updated July 2nd, 2021

Never do business with friends and family, as the old saying goes.

Especially if the business they are pushing is an MLM (multi-level marketing) scheme, which are not entirely the same as pyramid schemes, but close enough.

We only mention it because this mum was contacted by a friend suggesting just that, and her response managed to be brutal, hilarious, and a fabulous slow-burn, all in one.

And just in case that’s tricky to read …

‘Hi, I know you’re busy with teaching and your family but I’m wondering if you’d have any interest in hearing about my business. I have to ask. I’m committed to sharing it with others, especially my fellow mommies, and I know that busy people are successful people. Is there any chance you’d be open to chatting about it to see if it might be a good fit for you?”

‘I win!’

‘You will.’

‘No, I win!’

‘What do you win?’

‘When you added me as a friend, my husband and I made a bet of how long it be before you tried to push your MLM on me in a private message. He bet 1-5 messages, and I bet 6-10. Since you brought it up on the 6th message, I’m the winner!! No MLM seller ‘friend’ has ever waited longer than 10 messages to bring up their ‘amazing’ business. But be proud of yourself that you at least pretended to be my friend for a few messages before bringing it up! Yay for you!’

Ooof.

And it’s fair to say people found it relatable. Very relatable.

‘When I was in college, my Aunt called me, “out of the blue”, to see if I wanted “in on” her dildo party business. I declined and our relationship has never been the same.😂’ app999

‘At least she was properly equipped if you told her to go f-ck herself.’ WallabyInTraining

‘God I wish I’d done this! A few years ago it was my 10 year high school reunion and I noticed a few people from high school friending me of Facebook, and one was this girl Megan. She was asking me everything about my life what I’d been up to. I kept asking myself, why the fuck was she being so friendly, we never even spoke in HS! The next day, boom, a sales pitch for her stupid weigh loss shakes or whatever.

‘What’s even more funny is that afterwards, whenever I got new friend requests from someone from high school I looked at their profile first, and most of them had their own MLM bullshit.’ Souled_Out895

‘Hey hun! I know you’re busy, what with life, an actual career and not losing all your friends by sucking them into shitty pyramid schemes, but I was wondering if I could sell you some essential oils so I can make my $2.48 this month 🙂 Thanks, hun! XOXOXO’ beerbellybegone

Source Reddit u/beerbellybegone