‘What’s the weirdest thing you saw on your commute?’ – 25 funniest answers
We don’t commute as much as we used to, for reasons we don’t need to go into here. Possibly you didn’t commute in the first place.
But for anyone who used to get the train or bus to work, or drive or walk or however they hell they used to commute, comedy writer and author Jim Felton had a question for them.
What’s the weirdest thing you saw on your commute? I once sat next to a man who pulled a baked potato out of a briefcase and ate it like a apple
— James Felton (@JimMFelton) February 13, 2021
And it turned out people had seen lots of weird things – lots and lots of weird things – and here are our favourites.
1.
A man’s flat cap got pulled off his head by the draught of a tube train. As he watched it vanish into the tunnel, he opened his shoulder bag, took out a new cap and put it on his head without missing a beat or changing expression.
— Crispin (@SirMustard) February 13, 2021
2.
My husband once forgot to drop the bin bag at the bins at the end of the garden and got on the train with it instead, had to sit next to it for his commute 🤦🏻♀️😆
— Olivia Rowley 💙 (@oliviaRowley17) February 13, 2021
3.
Man holding a hot water bottle for most of our train commute from Coventry to London who then drank it just before we pulled into Euston https://t.co/0xAnVS54nH
— Dawn Foster (@DawnHFoster) February 13, 2021
4.
On the Northern line a guy dressed as a Roman gladiator got on at Stockwell….at Borough a guy got on dressed as a crocodile…he went into hysterics when he saw gladiator..saying Claire said come as an alligator you f ing muppet
— The Fish (@FishBigThe) February 13, 2021
5.
My friend witnessed a woman eat two whole melons with a spoon and I would do anything to have this kind of excitement back in my life pic.twitter.com/l6pzCmhjwn
— Ali Gray (@The_Shiznit) February 13, 2021
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Promo > Subway have bravely handed over access their instore radio network to legendary comedy pirate radio station Kurupt FM
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6.
A pigeon that jumped on the tube at Aldgate East and stood calmly near the door until it got off at Moorgate.
— Mark Allerton (@MarkAAllerton) February 13, 2021
7.
Back when no one had a mobile phone, & some guy used to travel on my train shouting Trigger Happy style into his huge briefcase sized Motorola, till the morning he was in mid ‘conversation’ & it actually rang. He hadn’t got a clue how to answer it, & when he did, it was his mum.
— Jon Waples 💙 NHS (@Jon_Waples) February 13, 2021
8.
Oh – must also mention the man on a train who got through a whole bag of Werthers Originals by swallowing them whole with glugs of Sprite.
— Crispin (@SirMustard) February 13, 2021
9.
Driving in heavy rain I saw what looked like a Stormtrooper running along the canal path. When I got closer look it turned out to be a Stormtrooper running along the canal path.
— Drew Jones (@drewski_jones) February 13, 2021
10.
A man eating a full size Vienetta on the Birmingham New Street to Wigan train. I will be forever envious of his train snack prowess.
— Ellie (@Ellie_Outside_) February 13, 2021
11.
— Tom Gannon (@tomgannon1990) February 13, 2021
12.
On a VERY packed tube, sat with head down reading my book. Felt something cold splat onto the top of my head. Looked up to see a rather nervous-looking lady standing over me holding a spoon halfway between her open mouth and a pot of strawberry yoghurt.
— GeordieAlex (@AlexTheGeordie) February 13, 2021
13.
9.35 out of Walthamstow, crying woman in a wedding dress
— Willard Foxton Todd (@WillardFoxton) February 13, 2021
