The 25 funniest tweets of the week
13.
If you sit on a Scotch egg for long enough a tiny Glaswegian hatches out and says och.
— Sarah Dempster (@Dempster2000) September 6, 2020
14.
SPIDERMAN: I have spider-like powers
SUPERMAN: I can fly and have x-ray vision
WEATHERMAN: It's going to be overcast in Essex on Thursday— GlennyRodge (@GlennyRodge) September 7, 2020
15.
A shoplifting gang is stealing clothes in size order..the police believe they're still at large.
— Martin Williams (@Martin1Williams) September 8, 2020
16.
Uranus is part of arseholer system.
— The Original Twitflup! (@TheRealFlups) September 8, 2020
17.
Cop: can you describe your attacker?
J.R.R Tolkien: yes but it'll take ages
— Jon (@ArfMeasures) September 5, 2020
18.
here’s the problem with fruit: it’s inconsistent. some apples are delicious, some taste bad. sometimes blueberries are great, sometimes they are disgusting. you know what’s the same every time? doritos
— extremwly smart genius (@punished_picnic) September 9, 2020
19.
Sorry about my gender reveal oil spill, but I wanted it to be memorable. I am currently hiding from the authorities, but did anyone happen to notice if the wildlife turned more pink or more blue?
— Abbi Crutchfield (@curlycomedy) September 8, 2020
20.
Intergalactic
Planetary
Planetary
Intergalactic pic.twitter.com/29wEWFtFoA— Enough Of That Now (@AndyGilder) September 8, 2020
21.
Having spent ten years investigating the genome it's time to announce my findings. They've got pointy red hats, fishing rods and like sitting on big mushrooms.
— Gary Delaney (@GaryDelaney) September 9, 2020
22.
Hi, I’m 43 and my biggest fear in life is that a tweet will blow up so big my mom will find me on here.
— spinspinsugar (@bougerella) September 9, 2020
23.
When Carl saw his birthday cake he realized Becky hadn't forgiven him. pic.twitter.com/TrvTola9B9
— Christina, mother of spiders ✊🦇👻🤘 (@Aikiwomannc) September 9, 2020
24.
Found out Asda will print anything on a cake so that's the only way I'm sending out CVs from now on
— Chris Purchase 🌈 (@ChrisPurchase) September 9, 2020
25.
When the moon hits your knees and you mispronounce trees; sycamore
— rat (@antifajedward) September 8, 2020
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Our 25 favourite funny tweets of the week
Image Knixx, Karolina Grabowska on Pexels
