The 25 funniest tweets of the week
It’s the weekend, almost, and in a week that’s been packed with news we haven’t necessarily wanted to hear, we’ve all earned ten minutes doing nothing more complicated than having a laugh – in a coronavirus-free zone.
Here are 25 of the funniest things we’ve read on Twitter this week.
Think of three friends. If none of them are beetles you are a beetle. pic.twitter.com/nYEB5TxLFC
— Matt Morrow (@PoorMatty) September 5, 2020
"My back hurts all the time for no reason."
How I sit every day: pic.twitter.com/E8W9PDfYSc
— Knixx (@Knishkabob) September 7, 2020
The progression of all Twitter debates pic.twitter.com/K2vjwdXy7L
— Annika H Rothstein (@truthandfiction) September 6, 2020
I refuse to believe this aubergine that arrived in my veg box was about to be thrown away; I would pay premium prices for this pic.twitter.com/FUnN56EgI6
— Becca Wright (@_beccawright) September 5, 2020
Just said 'Love you' as I ended a phone call
To the guy dealing with my questions about my credit card
So, online banking forever it is, then
— Dean Burnett (@garwboy) September 7, 2020
I've seen plenty of disappointment in my day, but nothing rivals the look on my nephew's face when we walked into Build-A-Bear and he realized it wasn't a literal Frankenstein lab for grizzlies.
— Henpecked Hal (@HenpeckedHal) September 7, 2020
if i were shania twain, i would tweet “let’s go girls” every single morning for the rest of my life
— Liz Maupin (@LizMaupin) September 7, 2020
If by intermittent fasting you mean I haven’t figured out how to eat in my sleep yet then yes, I am
— Eternal Samnation (@portmanteauface) September 7, 2020
In space there is no gender. Only shirt colours. Doctors be like “congrats! It’s a science officer!”
— bones, a liminal being 🌱 (@SkeletonCrimes) September 9, 2020
My dad has decided to install motion sensor lights alongside the path in the back garden, effectively turning any nighttime walk to the shed into the video for Billie Jean.
— Jason (@NickMotown) September 8, 2020
Prince would have been a great presenter of Gardeners World. pic.twitter.com/3xLfO05CH2
— Andymack (@Andymack) September 7, 2020
TikTok and that cups song from Pitch Perfect narrowly avoiding each other like asteroids
— Marc (@MarcSnetiker) September 10, 2020