Boris Johnson blamed a ‘mutant algorithm’ for students’ A-level chaos – these 9 responses earned top marks
Boris Johnson – you remember, the prime minister – today blamed a ‘mutant algorithm’ for the A-level chaos that saw pupils have their results downgraded before another government U-turn.
Speaking at a thing in Leicestershire today, Johnson told students:
‘I’m afraid your grades were almost derailed by a mutant algorithm and I know how stressful that must’ve been for pupils up and down the country.
‘I’m very, very glad that it has finally been sorted out.’
And these 9 responses all earned an A** from us.
They were derailed by a mutant algorithm that descended suddenly from outer space and had nothing whatsoever to do with this government. https://t.co/0761gOCp4y
— Jessica Elgot (@jessicaelgot) August 26, 2020
“Next up is Derailed Grades by Mutant Algorithm.’ pic.twitter.com/pow7ghqDyp
— Balderdash (@notDcfcBoss) August 26, 2020
It wasn’t anyone’s fault. The algorithm was a ‘mutant algorithm ‘ says Boris Johnson today. It was the algorithm’s fault. It went mutant. It became sci-fi.
— Michael Rosen (@MichaelRosenYes) August 26, 2020
Pro tip: if you want to fuck up your tax returns just blame it on a "mutant algorithm."
— Katy (@KatyJayne101) August 26, 2020
There is no such thing as a mutant algorithm. The algorithm did exactly what it was told to do, which was protect the status quo and prevent grade inflation at all costs, regardless of real world circumstances or consequences. The mutants here are the ones who supported it.
— Katy Brand (@KatyFBrand) August 26, 2020
Boris Johnson, 13 August: "Let’s be in no doubt about it, the exam results that we’ve got today are robust. They’re good, they’re dependable for employers."
Boris Johnson today: "Your grades were almost derailed by a mutant algorithm. I know how stressful that must have been."
— Martin Belam (@MartinBelam) August 26, 2020
Can't wait to watch the latest installment in the X-Men franchise as Magneto takes on his latest recruit: Algorithm. His special mutant power? Slide rules extending from his fists with which he can eradicate the hopes of an entire generation. https://t.co/ynxF09TJEt
— Michael Govern Ready (@mikegove12) August 26, 2020
To conclude …
Boris Johnson just told school children their grades were ‘almost derailed by a mutant algorithm’.
Could someone please gently remind him of the identity of the Prime Minister who is supposed to be in charge?
— David Lammy (@DavidLammy) August 26, 2020
And just in case you need to see it with your own eyes before you can possibly believe he said it …
Image @Haggis_UK screengrab