11 hilarious observations on pandemic life
The weekend saw the country get a lecture on morals from a man who has been sacked more than once for lying and won’t disclose how many children he has.
Luckily, he isn’t in charge of the UK’s coronavirus response …oh!
The funny people of Twitter have had their say on that, and on all this – *waves hand*.
MARCH COMMERCIAL: during these uncertain times, we’re thinking of you and your family
AUGUST COMMERCIAL: look you might as well catch it at burger king
— Ben Rosen (@ben_rosen) August 5, 2020
I miss eating out at restaurants so bad that I spit in my own food this afternoon.
— The Masked Vuigi (@VinceSideJokes) April 18, 2020
— James Felton (@JimMFelton) August 9, 2020
Do not let them take your temperature when entering a shop.
It's not a thermometer they have, it's a mind control device.
I went out to buy bread and milk, but when I got home, I somehow also had bought a family size bag of M&Ms, a grab bag of Doritos and 18 cans of lager
— ℍ (@hiddenliverpool) August 4, 2020
BREAKING: Matt Hancok is putting new city #lockdown measures up on Ceefax. Will get the page number as soon as I can source an old telly
— dave ❄️ (@davemacladd) August 7, 2020
— Kiersten Warren (@KierstenWarren) August 7, 2020
Does it happen every 400 years? pic.twitter.com/rYc1Z2VmTV
— Schubert's World (@HerbertSchuber2) August 8, 2020
Them: "If you all stay inside for a couple of months, it'll give us time to figure this out."
5 months later:
Us: "We did our part. How's it going?"
Them: "Great! We've made "anti-masker" a political identity, opened the schools & hobbled the post office."
— Kumail Nanjiani (@kumailn) August 6, 2020
Feels like a good year for the earth to take up smoking. https://t.co/e881tixTdK
— Kashana (@kashanacauley) August 6, 2020
When this is all over, I’m wearing runway looks to the coffee shop and full on red carpet looks to the bar.
— Akilah Green (@akilahgreen) August 5, 2020
I have to say, the story about Liz Truss bunging one of her mates tens of millions of pounds of taxpayers’ money for masks we can’t fucking use has really shocked me.
Honestly didn’t think she was intelligent enough to do a corruption.
— ️ Max ️ (@SpillerOfTea) August 6, 2020