The hilarious Jurassic Park Updates Twitter account is on course to be a roaring success – our top 10 tweets
There’s a new and very funny Twitter account distracting us from work, life, and – most importantly – the news.
Jurassic Park Updates does what it says on the tin, to hilarious effect. We’ve picked ten brilliant tweets to give you a taster.
1.
Science Fact: Our team of bone doctors are able to put bones back inside the dinosaur's meat, which is how they can walk around like in olden times. What would you do with YOUR bones?
— Jurassic Park Updates (@JurassicPark2go) July 7, 2020
2.
many guests are asking if dinosaurs are “different from dragons”. we hear you and we are looking into it
— Jurassic Park Updates (@JurassicPark2go) July 6, 2020
3.
the screaming is fine we just checked it out it was nothing
— Jurassic Park Updates (@JurassicPark2go) July 7, 2020
4.
if anyone sees a dinosaur in like a random place let us know haha
— Jurassic Park Updates (@JurassicPark2go) July 6, 2020
5.
Stop complaining about our disgusting bathrooms. We have dinosaurs. We are a miracle
— Jurassic Park Updates (@JurassicPark2go) July 7, 2020
6.
Science Fact: Dinosaurs are birds. Our whole park is just a bunch of huge birds. We realized this because a lot of them go SQUAK!
— Jurassic Park Updates (@JurassicPark2go) July 7, 2020
7.
if a dinosaur approaches you tell it to knock it off
— Jurassic Park Updates (@JurassicPark2go) July 6, 2020
8.
a lot of people think one of our triceratops took that huge triceratops dump that you see in the movie but actually we used triceratops dump dna to recreate a huge pile of triceratops shit
— Jurassic Park Updates (@JurassicPark2go) July 7, 2020
9.
as of today Jurassic Park is officially safer than the beach
— Jurassic Park Updates (@JurassicPark2go) July 6, 2020
10.
the tour guides know the names of some of the dinosaurs like tyrannosaurus rex and velociraptor but there will be others where they pull up and just say “heres some dinosaurs”
— Jurassic Park Updates (@JurassicPark2go) July 7, 2020
BONUS:
if you lost a loved one to a winged dinosaur today they have an unfair advantage so we’ll give you a free admission tomorrow. if you lost someone to a dinosaur on legs sorry but we have legs too
— Jurassic Park Updates (@JurassicPark2go) July 7, 2020
Seems fair.
Now go and follow them.
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Source Jurassic Park Updates Image Screengrabs