Boris Johnson’s Liaison Committee appearance went as well as you’d imagine -14 damning verdicts

Oonagh Keating. Updated May 28th, 2020

Boris Johnson faced the Liaison Committee – a kind of supergroup of select committee heads – to answer questions about his government’s coronavirus response.

They grilled him for two hours. It went about as well as you’d expect.

These reactions form a kind of Cliff Notes version – they tell you all you need to know without actually having to sit through it.

Boris Johnson putting in a 2 hour shift at the #LiaisonCommittee but if you take out the umms and errs it was actually 7 minutes

— end of daves ❄️ 🥕 🧻 (@davemacladd) May 27, 2020

The Boris Johnson Answer Strategy

1. Compliment the question

2. Waffle about completely unrelated nonsense for several minutes

3. Never apologise

4. Repeat meaningless slogans#LiaisonCommittee

— three steaks pam (@alexandra_kuri) May 27, 2020

Johnson is so ill informed that he probably thinks furlough is the bloke who sang Wide Eyed and Legless.#LiaisonCommittee

— Peter Smith (@Redpeter99) May 27, 2020

If this was a job interview to wave at buses, he still wouldn't get the role. #LiaisonCommittee

— Karl Minns (@karlminns) May 27, 2020

Boris Johnson says he's been "forbidden from announcing any more deadlines" or targets, which is an odd way to announce that Prime Minister is no longer the top job.

— James Felton (@JimMFelton) May 27, 2020

I see an emperor with no clothes. 👇 pic.twitter.com/B42UOPdVNF

— Piers Morgan (@piersmorgan) May 27, 2020

The only difference between The Verve’s "cat in a bag waiting to drown” and what I’m watching here is the bag.

— Pete Paphides (@petepaphides) May 27, 2020

This has the flavour of the time he visited the police academy and was so confused and useless that he gave that policewoman standing behind him a whitey and she fainted

— Marina Hyde (@MarinaHyde) May 27, 2020

Some allegations were untrue but he can't tell us which ones because reasons. Seems to sum things up nicely.

— James O'Brien (@mrjamesob) May 27, 2020

10.

Fiver says this is the last time he ever appears before the Liaison Committee.

— Emma Kennedy (@EmmaKennedy) May 27, 2020

11.

This is going so badly, Boris Johnson must be expecting at any second for all his teeth to fall out, realise he's got no trousers on and Leo Sayer to walk in singing a song about asbestos before he wakes up drenched in sweat.

— Nick Pettigrew (@Nick_Pettigrew) May 27, 2020

12.

If you have a 72 inch plasma TV you can see the top of Cummings's head as he whispers answers from beneath the table.

— Mark ne-Francois-pas MP (@MarkFrancois12) May 27, 2020

13.

That look when you realise everyone else has done their homework except you. #LiaisonCommittee pic.twitter.com/3GjtRPWG9Y

— Tiernan Douieb (@TiernanDouieb) May 27, 2020

14.

Jesus Christ Britain, who did you elect???Johnson is even thicker than Trump!#LiaisonCommittee

— Daniela Nadj (@Nadjdaniela) May 27, 2020

We could have saved you even more time and just posted this.

For anyone short of time, here is a summary of my answers:
"wiffle waffle pish pash flibber flabber bullshit bollocks" #liaisoncommittee

— Parody Boris Johnson (@BorisJohnson_MP) May 27, 2020

But where’s the fun in that?

Image UK Parliament