Our 18 favourite jokes about all this *gestures at the news*

We hope everybody’s got their head around the updated Covid-19 strategy now, or at least has an abundance of common sense and an old whack-a-mole set in the cupboard under the stairs.

If not, there may be a tip or two among these funny tweets.

1.

You have to leave the park if you recognise someone when you go there??

— Louis Theroux (@louistheroux) May 11, 2020

2.

I’ve worked out how to see my sons again – I’m going to employ them as my cleaners.

— Piers Morgan (@piersmorgan) May 11, 2020

3.

The only thing I’ve learned from working at home is that the people who clean the restrooms at the office really earn their keep.

— Boyd's Backyard™ (@TheBoydP) May 10, 2020

4.

well yeah if it gets that fucking big pic.twitter.com/cwa54SlJjY

— jon ronson (@jonronson) May 10, 2020

5.

For clarity the govt has introduced a new colour coded uniform system. Wear blue/black if you’ve tested positive for covid, white/gold if your test results are negative. Apart from Tuesdays, when the opposite applies. Unless you’re not unable to work from home. Simple. #StayAlert pic.twitter.com/6L13CkzgQe

— christhebarker (@christhebarker) May 11, 2020

6.

So you can go to a park, meet people without touching so just look at them from at least 2 metres apart?

Are we sure these are the official COVID-19 restrictions or just advice from the local dogging spot?

— CJ de Mooi (@cjdemooi) May 11, 2020

7.

Boris's Feng Shui Tips
No.1: Always sit in a doorway facing the back of your desk. #thanksboris #stayingalert pic.twitter.com/UmmrbPSHzb

— Parody Boris Johnson (@BorisJohnson_MP) May 11, 2020

8.

The British public has to stop it with the gotcha questions. It has behaved disgracefully at these press briefings. When this is over there will be a reckoning for the British public.

— robert shrimsley (@robertshrimsley) May 11, 2020

9.

Why do we never hear about the brave free thinkers who spent the Blitz telling everyone in sight that blackout curtains were just a scam cooked up by Big Fabric, and that the Luftwaffe had killed fewer people than the last war with Spain?

— Greg Egan (@gregeganSF) May 10, 2020