25 virus-free funny things from this week
Happy Friday, everyone. What’s Friday? What’s a day? Hands up if you remember what a calendar was for!
Enough of that nonsense – here are 25 very funny tweets from this week.
1.
Would definitely recommend yoga to anyone who enjoys being upside down and in agony
— Frankie Boyle (@frankieboyle) April 20, 2020
2.
fleeting moment of dad victory today as I told a joke my 12yr old laughed at but then it became clear that she wants trainers
— joe (@mutablejoe) April 19, 2020
3.
Must be Dutch with a name like that https://t.co/wWXtAPd6II
— Paul_Ed (@eddo75) April 18, 2020
4.
i’m crying😭😭 pic.twitter.com/OXNXSZBXsd
— frida lyngstad apologist | nsfr (@planetpaulson) April 18, 2020
5.
Who called it a monastery and not monkey business
— Craig Deeley 🇪🇺🏳️🌈 (@craiguito) April 19, 2020
6.
Telly show idea. Great Escape To The Country. A couple look around three cottages before being shot by some Germans.
— GlennyRodge (@GlennyRodge) April 19, 2020
7.
Opinions are like horses: I have 8 and they are all bad
— horse deals (@heymermaid) April 21, 2020
8.
Me: Pad Thai please
Server: sir, this is a McDonald's
Me: sorry. McPad McThai McPlease
— Pessimus Prime Minister (@BigJDubz) April 18, 2020
9.
Posting a joke online as a comedian and having a bunch of random people tell you why it’s not funny/not true must be how doctors feel when I roll in with WebMD and tell them that men get thrush too.
— Daniel Muggleton (@danmuggleton) April 17, 2020
10.
MY PRINTER (needy): I have to have more ink! Give me more ink! I am dying of thirst here!
ALSO MY PRINTER: Go on then. Guess the unlikely combination of buttons to make me actually open up to allow you to replace the cartridges, loser
— Martin Belam (@MartinBelam) April 20, 2020
11.
It’s like God made blossom trees to show the cement that a bit of blusher and mascara never hurt anyone.
— Aisling Bea (@WeeMissBea) April 19, 2020
12.
Just got back from my run 🏃♂ pic.twitter.com/RNly92EUxy
— Ian Pippin (@Ianpippin) April 19, 2020
