14 times ‘That Bloke Jesus’ on Twitter nailed life under lockdown
9.
Quick question
How do you self isolate when you are 3 people in 1?
— Jesus H Christ (@ThatBloke_Jesus) March 21, 2020
10.
All travel from Earth to Heaven will be postponed until further notice
Please make alternative plans
Thankyou
— Jesus H Christ (@ThatBloke_Jesus) March 12, 2020
11.
Supper cancelled. FFS pic.twitter.com/pgNzttYfhg
— Jesus H Christ (@ThatBloke_Jesus) March 13, 2020
12.
Please stop praying to me
It’s pretty clear I don’t give a fuck
— Jesus H Christ (@ThatBloke_Jesus) March 13, 2020
13.
Where is everyone?
Bollocks to this, i’ll come back for my birthday instead
— Jesus H Christ (@ThatBloke_Jesus) April 12, 2020
14.
Working from home pic.twitter.com/TpigGDr783
— Jesus H Christ (@ThatBloke_Jesus) April 9, 2020
Then there are the evergreens like these …
Judas is buying everyone shots.
Seems to have a bit more cash than normal…..
Good for him— Jesus H Christ (@ThatBloke_Jesus) March 29, 2018
Remember when I wasted years of my life as a carpenter making tables and shit before I realized I could do magic
— Jesus H Christ (@ThatBloke_Jesus) August 8, 2017
Arrived at the restaurant
Decided to all sit on the same side of the table
— Jesus H Christ (@ThatBloke_Jesus) March 29, 2018
Any boulder removal companies working today?
I am in a pickle
— Jesus H Christ (@ThatBloke_Jesus) April 21, 2019
SURPRISE!!!!
— Jesus H Christ (@ThatBloke_Jesus) April 20, 2014
And just in case anyone was wondering or in any doubt …
Larry has totally got me here https://t.co/41yTFklQQU
— Jesus H Christ (@ThatBloke_Jesus) March 13, 2020
Lots more of that kind of thing here.
READ MORE
What if Jesus were a Tory? 17 biblical epics
Source @ThatBloke_Jesus