Top 10 excuses to get you out of that Zoom meeting
Just because meetings are via Zoom now, doesn’t mean people want to go to them any more than they usually do.
One fed-up QC, the very funny @DavidMuttering, asked Twitter for some creative excuses to help him avoid them.
Writers of Twitter – can you put your creative talents into thinking of excuses for the rest of us to avoid tedious meetings and unwelcome zoom drinks? Old favourites like "I'm sorry, I've got a thing that night" and "I'm not in London then, I'm afraid" no longer cut any ice.
— David QC (@DavidMuttering) March 31, 2020
Twitter stepped up beautifully, but these were our ten favourites.
"I'm sorry I have explosive diarrhea" usually works
— ⚫staringatclouds❄️🇬🇧🇪🇺#FBPE#BitchAgainstBrexit (@staringatclouds) March 31, 2020
Flip it. Enthusiastically attend one. Behave outrageously. Offend everyone. Eat all the virtual canapes. You won’t be invited again.
— Deborah Samuel (@deborahmsamuel) March 31, 2020
“S.ry but th. inter..t si…l is v… b.d I do.t thi.k I ca. ma.. .t”
— The Brumster (@BriefThat) March 31, 2020
Poor connection due to kids playing Fortnite
— MushyMelbowHead (@MushyMelbowHead) March 31, 2020
Accept gracefully, then at the allotted time text ‘Has anyone got in? It’s not letting me join for some reason.’
— Boudicca of Suburbia (@BoudiccaMum) March 31, 2020
I’m locked in attick.
— Scott Innes (@Flying_Inside) March 31, 2020
You’re busy getting shopping for elderly neighbours?
— Mo' (@mocent0) March 31, 2020
Sorry clashes with my boris walk
— Leisha Bond (@Leisha007) March 31, 2020
Pre-existing digital commitment.
— Rebecca Major (@BecMajor) March 31, 2020
I can’t find my clothes?
— Damian Barr (@Damian_Barr) March 31, 2020
If an excuse has worked once, there’s no reason why it can’t work again.
You could try Peter Cook’s line when asked to dinner with Andrew and Fergie. ‘I’m sorry, I find I’m watching television that evening.’
— Lev Parikian (@LevParikian) March 31, 2020
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