Simply 17 coronavirus jokes to help take the edge off (a little bit)

Here are 17 jokes a little bit (and sometimes a lot) related to coronavirus to help take the edge off while we count the days until the very worst case scenario – we run out of bog roll.

1.

Someone on the radio said Britain will remain calm about the Coronavirus.
People phoned the police when KFC ran out of chicken

— joe heenan (@joeheenan) March 6, 2020

2.

ALERT‼️‼️‼️
The corona virus can be spread through money. If you have any money at home, put on some gloves, put all the money in to a plastic bag and put it outside the front door tonight. I'm collecting all the plastic bags tonight for safety. Think of your health.

— Pre K ❄️ (@stayfrea_) March 4, 2020

3.

Ever since it was brought to my attention that you can say “Covid-19” to the tune of “Come on, Eileen,” I’ve been unable to read it any other way

— Dr. David Shiffman (@WhySharksMatter) March 4, 2020

4.

I'll tell you what I want, what I really really want

So tell me what you want, what you really really want

I wanna I wanna I wanna I wanna

I really really really wanna 9 pack of Andrex quilted, a bottle of Carex hand gel, two tins of tomatoes, and a 500g bag of penne please.

— Dr Philip Lee (@drphiliplee1) March 6, 2020

5.

Just been sensibly stocking up on 45 packets of pasta and noticed a lot of idiots panic buying.

— Simon Blackwell (@simonblackwell) March 6, 2020

6.

the tube in the time of coronavirus pic.twitter.com/Z3R7Bxo6cP

— Mark Di Stefano (@MarkDiStef) March 6, 2020

7.

East London cares not for your plague panic. We will shit in our own good time. pic.twitter.com/2rvfuJsfpO

— Mitten d'Amour (@MittenDAmour) March 6, 2020

8.

So it seems that what we fear the most is the inability to wipe our arses. #COVID19

— Dom Joly (@domjoly) March 6, 2020

9.

To all Australians:
If you find yourself at home, staring at a large stockpile of toilet paper…🧻
You’ve contradicted the dreaded fuckwititis, and must be quarantined from society.
Because you’re now not a part of society. #toiletpaperpanic #toiletpaper #ToiletPaperEmergency pic.twitter.com/Lf0E6fZSsY

— Wade of Planet Earth (@Becauseofnow) March 6, 2020

10.

https://twitter.com/craiguito/status/1235970585378861056?s=20

11.

I’m not worried about a shortage of toilet paper – I have set aside a substantial supply of things I can use instead:
-the Russia Report
-any briefing paper longer than 3 bullet points
-written complaints about Priti Patel#toiletpaperpanic #COVIDー19

— Parody Boris Johnson (@BorisJohnson_MP) March 6, 2020

12.

What would you think if you saw this just a month ago? I’d assume wanking epidemic pic.twitter.com/ykB6MC1wor

— Summer Ray (@SummerRay) March 6, 2020

13.

Anyone want a Scotch egg?

I misheard and thought everyone was "picnic buying".

I've got thousands of them.#coronavirus

— Tony Cowards (@TonyCowards) March 6, 2020

14.

Brisbane jeweller delivering the Friday laughs #toiletpaperpanic @10NewsFirstQLD pic.twitter.com/oP6vnsvSwj

— Georgina Hill (@GeorgiHill10) March 6, 2020

15.

And, here I am again laughing way too hard at a #COVIDー19 meme. 🤣 pic.twitter.com/I0xLSmUOaa

— Lindsay (@linzy_lou82) March 6, 2020

16.

Toilet paper is out of stock. Cat litter isn't. You know what you need to do. #toiletpaperpanic

— Thomas G. Burt (@thomasgburt) March 6, 2020

17.

https://twitter.com/thatjimdavis/status/1235932483046322176?s=20

BONUS!

The guy who invented hand sanitiser must be rubbing his hands together right now

— Kate PT3 (@KateMMA3) March 5, 2020

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