People are describing their roles via “greatest hits” – 28 absolute bangers
Do you ever feel that people don’t understand what’s involved in your job or your role in life and you wish you could tell them? The latest Twitter meme encourages people to do exactly that, by explaining their “greatest hits”.
It seemed to start with this delightful offering, from senior engineer, Jules Glegg.
Hi, I’m a senior engineer. You might know me from my greatest hits “but *why* is it null?” “There is greater honor in deleting code than in writing more” And the chart-topping “let’s just walk over to them and ask”
— Jules Glegg 🏳️⚧️ (@heyjulesfern) February 27, 2020
It spread like a virus in a face-touching sneeze party, and these were our favourites.
1.
Hi, I'm a Twitter Employee. You might know me from my hits “Sorry I can’t ban Donald Tr*mp” "I don’t know why there isn’t an edit button" And the chart-topping, "Nope, I can’t verify you." https://t.co/sde804U7qz
— Hamza (@oihamza) February 29, 2020
2.
Hi, I’m a pediatrician. You may know me from my hits “that’s not technically a fever” “I still can’t fix that cough,” and the chart-topping “let me explain again why an antibiotic isn’t indicated.” https://t.co/xyndVlE1bh
— Daniel Summers (@WFKARS) March 1, 2020
3.
Hi, I'm a PR expert. You might know me from my hits "why are we launching this?" "Who actually needs this?" And the chart-topping, "your so-called PR problem is actually a product problem." https://t.co/fMVtDJ4rZd
— jessica powell (@themoko) February 28, 2020
4.
Hi, I’m an accountant. You might know me from my hits “I just worked 70 hours this week,” “I cant go because that’s during busy season,” and the chart-topping, “no, I can’t help you with your taxes.” https://t.co/WM7M6K11Z7
— TheBig4Accountant (@TheBig4Tweets) March 2, 2020
5.
Hi, I’m a College Professor: You might know me from my hits “Read the syllabus” “No, I don’t give extra credit” “It’s the last day of class so No I don’t have office hours” “I actually can’t speak to yr parents” “It’s Dr. not Mrs.” And the chart-topping, “It’s. ON. The.Syllabus.” https://t.co/Dl9tVK35t3
— the black mommy activist (@kayewhitehead) March 1, 2020
6.
Hi, I'm a photographer. You might know me from my hits “Exposure won’t pay my rent” “Please don’t steal my work” and the chart-topping, “Yes the iPhone takes great photos but please get in the sea.” https://t.co/UuUsmtc0FD
— Zoë Noble (@ZoNoPhoto) February 29, 2020
7.
Hi, I’m a hairstylist. You may remember me from such hits as “you sure you haven’t coloured your own hair?” “Yes a trim costs the same as a cut and blow dry” “Don’t mind me, I haven’t managed a lunch hour in 19 years” https://t.co/vdz4PcS00a
— your mum (@AuntyMartin) March 3, 2020
8.
Hi, I’m an interior designer. You may know me from hits such as “you have 3 small kids and only want white sofas?” “Are you sure you want to fill your £3m home with £25.99 lamps” and the smash hit “Ohh! Your mother in law has a flair for design, does she?!” https://t.co/6yh1AMEBTW
— Charlotte (@RoylePin) March 3, 2020
9.
Hi. I'm a comedian. You may know me from such classics as 'you don't have to like it, comedy is subjective you know', 'yes that was the joke' and 'is there an exit I can go through to avoid the audience?' https://t.co/oUA2YBQdrd
— Tiernan Douieb (@TiernanDouieb) March 2, 2020
10.
Hi, I’m a press officer. You may know me from such floor-filling bangers as “OK, but what’s the news angle?”, “I’m afraid the piece didn’t run in the end” and “I have no power to impel Ed Sheeran to agree to an interview” https://t.co/CtjiGomHuX
— Rick Burin (@rickburin) March 2, 2020
11.
Hi, I'm an epidemiologist. You may know me from my hits "no, I don't study skin diseases," "correlation is not necessarily causation," and the chart-topping "it depends." #epitwitter https://t.co/loWZAZrr3p
— Julia Marcus, PhD, MPH (@JuliaLMarcus) March 2, 2020
12.
Hi, I'm a web developer, you may know me from my smash hits "Websites don't work like that", "Websites don't work like that", "Websites don't work like that" and "Websites can work like that but really shouldn't" https://t.co/PY1QtWM8EA
— Seb Patrick (@sebpatrick) March 2, 2020
13.
Hi, I’m a sportswriter. You might know me from my hits “You can’t sit with me in the press box” and “I carry my own bag thank you.” And the chart-topping “No, I can’t get you tickets to the game.” https://t.co/lDmlbE0Ktq
— Teresa Walker (@TeresaMWalker) March 1, 2020
14.
Hi I'm a Detective. You may know me from my hits " I'd like an early update from the scene" "I need you to widen the cordon" and the chart topping "nobody is to go off duty until I have their statements" https://t.co/e42G08M3vF
— Life of a Detective (@SurreyDetective) March 2, 2020