These 21 lyrics are bad – really, really bad
In recent years, songs that were once really popular have fallen foul of a more considerate attitude among listeners, leaving ‘Baby, It’s Cold Outside’ out in the cold for straying into sexual assault territory, while ‘Fairytale of New York’ goes all-in with a bleak homophobic slur.
But there are other terrible lyrics out there that have flown under the radar, until composer Nick Harvey asked this:
When you hear them, what song lyrics, without fail, every single time, make you wince due to their sheer awfulness?
I’ll start:
“Even food don’t taste that good.”
When You’re Gone – Bryan Adams & Mel C
— Nick Harvey (@mrnickharvey) November 30, 2019
Frankly, the replies to this have ruined some songs for us – forever – but we’re passing them on so your favourites can be ruined as well. Some are funny, but others are just truly awful. Enjoy.
These were really creepy.
1.
"I crept in your room, to make love to you, is that alright?" -Roy Orbison, I drove all night
No Roy, it's not alright, it's rapey, very rapey.
— Simon Randell (@sim_randell) 30 November 2019
2.
Got a picture of you beside me, got your lipstick mark still on your coffee cup 😑 https://t.co/VGsRKtl6eg
— Grace Petrie 🌹 Vote Labour (@gracepetrie) December 1, 2019
3.
“Everybody needs a bosom for a pillow”
Brimful of Asha (Cornershop) https://t.co/EN0euekOaS
— Daniel Sugarman (@Daniel_Sugarman) December 1, 2019
4.
And when your body's had enough of me
And I'm layin' flat out on the floor
When you think I've loved you all I can
I'm gonna love you a little bit more. Creepy.— daveyhelen (@daveyhelen) 30 November 2019
These were talking nonsense.
5.
"Kilimanjaro rises like Olympus above the Serengeti."
Toto – Africa
1. No, it doesn't. It's 300km away.
2. Comparing a mountain to another mountain is an awful simlie.
3. Especially when the other mountain is about half the height.The small hill on which I will die. 😔
— Martin Presland (@MartinPresland) 30 November 2019
6.
"I don't want to see a ghost
It's a sight that I fear most
I'd rather have a piece of toast
And watch the evening newsLife, oh life, oh life, oh life
Doo, doo doo doo" – Des'ree – 'Life' 1998— edgarwright (@edgarwright) 1 December 2019
7.
I called up the Captain, please bring me my wine. He said “we haven’t had that spirit here since 1969”. Husband and I both angrily shout the word WINE over ‘spirit’ every time
— Christmas Gammon (@Princ3ssGC) 30 November 2019
8.
"The female of the species is more deadlier than the male"
WRONG WRONG WRONG. It's either "deadlier" or "more deadly". Can't be both. This song drives me up the wall.
— Phil Ronan 🇪🇺 (@phil_ronan) 30 November 2019
9.
He drinks a whiskey drink, he drinks a vodka drink, he drinks a lager drink, he drinks a cider drink. GAAAAAAAAH, STOP SAYING DRINK
— Rachel Clare (@raquelle) 30 November 2019
10.
‘4am in the morning’ – Moonlight Shadow.
— Debra (@ddebralouise) 30 November 2019
11.
That bit at the beginning of Never Ever by All Saints brings me out in hives: "A few questions that I need to know…"
You have a few questions that you need to ASK. Now bugger off and never darken my door again. https://t.co/jYkjwcnXxf
— Jason (@NickMotown) December 1, 2019