These 22 terrible dates will make you seriously consider becoming a hermit
Opinions are divided on dating as to whether it’s the best thing about being single or a necessary evil to endure so you can eventually change that status. When composer, funny tweeter, and father of the precocious Baskerville, Nick Harvey, asked Twitter to share their dating war stories, he set off an avalanche of stories that could very well put everyone off the activity for life.
Here’s the tweet that started it all.
What is the worst date you've ever been on?
— Nick Harvey (@mrnickharvey) October 21, 2019
And these are the best – or worst – replies.
1.
One in which I had to make clear that I wasn't a sex offender 10 minutes in and which resulted in me drinking tea alone on my sofa 35 minutes after the beginning of the date.
— Gary Bainbridge (@Gary_Bainbridge) October 21, 2019
2.
She sat smiling and not saying anything for 2 hours, then “Gay Bar” by Electic Six played and she burst into tears and ran to the toilets. When she came back she told me she’s been seeing the synth player in the band and had been dumped when his wife found out a few days earlier https://t.co/JUCXEgIH2r
— Bethany Blackula (@BeffernieBlack) October 21, 2019
3.
London, 1994. Girl I fancied for ages turned out to be an undercover cop and busted me for supplying E.
— RyanFromIreland🌍 (@RyanFromIrelan1) October 21, 2019
4.
Out for dinner, my date kept leaning to the left to look over my shoulder – not to see who else was coming into the restaurant, but to look at himself in the mirror behind me.
— Mum's got a Sharpie (@Mycatlola) October 21, 2019
5.
He asked me what the worst thing I’d ever done was (I was 17 not much) then told me his was that he’d had sex with his sister. His actual biological sister…
— Sophia Behn (@SophiaBehn) October 21, 2019
6.
Took me to see Up ‘n’ Under then invited me back for coffee & to see his Shakin’ Stevens collection. Thought he was being ironic, (it was the mid 90’s) he wasn’t. Reminiscent of the Alan Partridge superfans lounge. I left via a first floor bathroom window while he made coffee
— Vickie (@vickietopliss) October 21, 2019
7.
The very first thing she did on sitting down was take out a small glass bottle and started spooning a syrupy liquid into her mouth. "Homeopathy?" I asked, heart sinking. "No, a powerful sedative-hypnotic drug" she replied, "If I don't take it I'd be hysterical right now."
— Conor Horgan (@ConorHorgan) October 21, 2019
8.
First drink. He told me his last relationship had ended when his ex left the country.
Me: oh no! When did that happen?
Him: this morning12 minutes later I was on my way home.
— Rachael Spook Again (@RachaelHasIdeas) October 21, 2019
9.
He exclusively talked about steam fairs.
— Amy Shackleton (@quartzbrained) October 21, 2019
10.
She brought up immigration (she was not a fan), then took a call from her mate whose date had gone wrong, *invited him to join us*, we had to hear his long tale of how his date was “a mental bird”, then went to a bar where I paid £15 for 2 drinks and got groped by a drunk man. https://t.co/equKQWV38i
— James Moran (@jamesmoran) October 21, 2019
11.
I think I know the answer to this. He took me to a dealer’s house, which was then raided and we finished the evening with our pants in our pockets at the station. https://t.co/wSyUPdcJsL
— Mistress Claire Leavey Esq. (@retrometroco) October 21, 2019
