Serving up our 23 favourite tennis jokes to round off Wimbledon Fortnight
It’s the final day of Wimbledon and, as always, there’ve been some shocks and surprises along the way, such as fifteen-year-old Cori Gauff beating her idol, Venus Williams, in the first round, Andy Murray partnering with Venus’ sister, Serena, in the mixed doubles, and Woody Harrelson getting so drunk he struggled to get back to his seat.
Woody Harrelson pissed, trying to get back to his Royal Box seat at Wimbledon. Have a great weekend everyone. You’re welcome. pic.twitter.com/JqpZH5cp1F
— Oli Bell (@olibellracing) July 13, 2019
The women’s finals ended in a win for Simona Halep against Serena Williams, the men’s doubles final took almost five hours and Nicolas Mahut got hit right in the tennis balls, much to Woody Harrelson’s surprise.
Tennis player at Wimbledon gets hit in groin
Director: CUT TO WOODY HARRELSON
pic.twitter.com/o2zWLNRGer— Brad Galli (@BradGalli) July 13, 2019
In short, Wimbledon belongs to Woody now, and that suits us just fine.
they’re closing the roof and I think woody harrelson just found this twitter thread pic.twitter.com/0oMxqTh1Fq
— #1 Woody Harrelson @ Wimbledon Documentarian (@TylerRuinsTV) July 13, 2019
Over the course of Wimbledon Fortnight – or Wimbledon Eternity, for those who are missing their usual programming – a lot of tweeters have been feeding the atmosphere with their witticisms, and here are a few of the best.
1.
I could watch Serena Williams and Andy Murray play tennis together all day. And then, at night, solve crimes.
— Andrew Dawson (@ADawsonBros) July 6, 2019
2.
Tennis has done very well for itself for a sport invented by someone who didn't know how to count #Wimbeldon #Djokovic
— Brona C. Titley (@bronactitley) July 11, 2017
3.
Not seen one person playing at Wimbledon serving underarm. Complete lack of sportsmanship.
— Josh Pugh (@JoshPughComic) July 3, 2019
4.
Tubes of tennis balls should have serving suggestions on the side.
— Olaf Falafel (@OFalafel) July 13, 2019
5.
Can’t believe Djokovic has a 150mph serve, 15 Grand Slam titles, and a Twitter bio like your mum’s friend Julie with the “keep calm and drink Prosecco” tote bag #Wimbledon pic.twitter.com/Cc0sQBE7Eb
— Eve Livingston (@eve_rebecca) July 14, 2019
6.
Tennis would be so much better if they had to shout "TENNIS" every time they hit the ball
— James Felton (@JimMFelton) July 12, 2019
7.
This is what the cast of Lethal Weapon look like now… #Wimbledon pic.twitter.com/fw7gesMud8
— Samantha Quek (@SamanthaQuek) July 14, 2019
8.
Watching #Wimbledon always reminds me of the time I dated a professional tennis player.
It was awful. Love meant nothing to her.
— Beau (@DrBeauBeaumont) July 8, 2019
9.
#Wimbledon Camera Person 1: Let’s do an EXTREME close up on a random detail in the crowd- like the back of someone’s head, or their sun glasses- and then an EXTREMELY slow fade out.
Camera Person 2: Or we could just film the tennis…?
Camera Person 1: You’re fired Kevin.
— Brona C. Titley (@bronactitley) July 8, 2019
10.
Some people don't like long tennis games but I think they have many advantages#Wimbledon
— Sanjeev Kohli (@govindajeggy) July 8, 2019
11.
And the devil took him up a high mountain and said, “This sizzling afternoon of sport, the cricket, the Grand Prix, the men’s final at Wimbledon, could be yours!” But he said, “Get away from me, for there are ordinations at Peterborough Cathedral!”
— Richard Coles (@RevRichardColes) July 14, 2019
12.
The men's doubles has been going on so long that my trousers are now back in fashion.#Wimbledon
— Peter Smith (@Redpeter99) July 13, 2019
