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This letter to the Guardian’s ‘sexual healing’ column is the definition of peak, peak awkward

John Plunkett. Updated March 12th, 2019

We’ve all been there – okay then, we’re guessing none of us have been there – when you’re introduced to your partner’s dad and, well, this happens, as documented by a Guardian reader’s letter to Pamela Stephenson Connolly’s ‘sexual healing’ column.

No wonder it went madly viral, shared thousands of times and generating hundreds of comments on the Guardian’s website.

Because you and everyone else is crying out for a little bit more detail, here it is.

If you want to read the full text of Pamela’s reply, then click here, but in three words it’s ‘walk away now’.

Before you do that, here’s what the Guardian’s readers had to say.

My opinion (and I’m sure many will disagree) is that you should tell her and let her make the decision. It’s unfair on her to just walk away, it’s unfair on you for her father to expect you to (and I suspect that he’s doing so in a pathetic attempt to avoid his own guilt).
Put everything in the open, she may well understand your past, she may not, but don’t make the choice for her, she may well want to spend the rest of her life with you don’t just walk away and deny her that. MattBucks

Tell the father that you will end the relationship but only on the condition that the his daughter knows the real reason. Then see if he is still as keen on that idea. VoiceOverIP

I completely disagree with this advice. The father has absolutely no right to decide who his daughter marries, and he’s hardly got the moral high ground to go around demanding others behave the way he wants. Personally if I was the letter writer I’d take the father aside and propose that the past is the past, to forget it ever happened and both move on. No one needs to confess anything. Most people don’t admit every single sexual encounter they’ve ever had to their partners. This really needn’t be any different. Ginevra_di_Benci

You should marry your girlfriend, and reveal everything at the wedding in front of of your astonished guests. Flatulentus

And on Twitter …

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