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This bridal magazine’s wedding night tips went viral because they’re so weird

John Plunkett. Updated February 8th, 2019

We’re grateful to someone called Adrianne Peltz for sharing this bridal magazine’s tips for happy couples who might not be sure what to get up to on their wedding night.

They went viral because they struck most people as exactly the sort of thing you probably shouldn’t be doing on your wedding night. Do they just need to get out more – or are these the worst wedding night tips imaginable?

And just to set the scene, the bit at the start where it assumes this is the first time the couple will have had sex, is probably the least weird thing about it.

And just in case any of that’s tricky to read, here it is again.

The wedding night is the first time you will have sex with your brand-new spouse, so here are a few tips to ensure all goes according to plan!

Forget the Foreplay

Now, this is not something we would not [sic] usually advocate, but like the lingerie, foreplay is best saved for those long, lazy days and nights on your honeymoon – as are the lit candles and rose petals! The wedding night is definitely the perfect time for some fast love after a long day!

Captured on Camera

Hair on fleck [sic], insta-worthy make-up and no doubt months of shaping up – so if you’ve ever considered making a sex tape, then this could be the ideal time! After all, you will want to capture all the other memories of your wedding day on camera – so why not piece things up [sic] and record the wedding night as well!

Like the wedding night, the various spelling mistakes suggest the whole thing was done in a hurry.

Here are some of our favourite things people said about it.

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And someone thought they found where it was from.

This person had a theory.

We’re with this guy.

And just in case you were wondering, here’s how it plays out in real life.

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