This mum’s review of Kleenex tissues is painfully funny (and instantly relatable to anyone with teenage boys)
If you’re the parent of a teenage boy, if you’ve ever been a teenage boy or, let’s face it, if you’ve ever known a teenage boy, then this review will probably ring true with you.
It was shared on Reddit and it’s headlined ‘A mother’s struggle’ and – you know what? – they’re not kidding.
And just in case that’s tricky to read (or your eyesight isn’t what it was) here it is in full. So much to enjoy here …
A mother’s struggle
I want to start this off by thanking Kleenex for selling these in 36 packs. I’ve put it on subscription, and if they want to start selling a 72-pack, sign me up. I have three reasons for needing this much Kleenex, and their names are Liam, Samuel and Hank.
This is how it goes in this house. First the Kleenex disappears. Then the toilet paper. Then they go for fabrics. And you don’t want it to get there, unless you’re ready to invest in a 5 gallon drum of Fabreeze.
This used to be a good Christian home. But it’s not about moral judgement anymore. I’m way beyond that. I’m in survival mode. If I don’t supply absorbent paper products, I’m going to find my dish towels hidden in the basement, stiff as aluminium. The other day, I almost cut my hand on a sock. I am sorry to speak so frankly, but with three teenage boys, a woman has got to be practical.
The funny part is, they think they’re being sneaky, with their 45 minute shows and sudden need for ‘privacy’ as if I’m going to walk in on them journaling. They slink around the house like unfixed cats, while I try to announce my location at all times. No one needs to ask me to knock anymore. I practically wear a cow bell. I’m not looking to catch anyone by surprise, believe me. I’m just trying to get through this.
The other day my husband was watching me unload the groceries and he asks me, all sweetness and light, ‘Honey what’re you doing with all that Kleenex?’
I about knocked him off his chair.
Just painfully funny and beautifully written (the bit about the sock is our favourite). We give it 5 stars.
