Why a vasectomy doesn’t stop with the operation is our favourite online discussion today
It began when someone on Reddit shared this picture of exactly how excited his wife was by his impending vasectomy.
And it prompted the occasional comment like this.
‘You don’t have to worry about the added expense of an unexpected child anymore, tell your wife she can print in full color next time’
And the odd horror story too.
‘It is a total TRAP! Neighbor had felt great the next day. No pain or discomfort. Decided to (push) mow the yard – and it was a small sliver of yard. He was in the hospital that night with his prize scrotum the size of a mayonnaise jar and the color of a plum. It added a lot more time to his recovery, as well.’
But it was when someone said this that things got really interesting.
‘Got mine a few years ago! Only regret is that I didn’t do it sooner. Good for you bro! It’s a great decision. Just remember not to stop using protection for 3 months afterwards. The factory may be shut down, but the warehouse is still full.’
A total revelation for many men, it turned out. And an excuse to get very puerile indeed (if not now, when?)
‘huh did not know that’
‘I wouldnt have either of he hadn’t put it so elegantly’
‘haha, so do you need to masturbate a bunch to clear out the excess inventory?’
‘It’s kind of like a liquidation sale, really.’
‘Everything’s gotta go!’
‘Yes, essentially. At least 30ish times to clear out the remaining sperm. You’ll need a post vasectomy semen analysis to determine if you’re sterile (i.e. no sperm is seen in your semen)’
‘See below for many different expert opinions’
And yes, there were many, many expert opinions.
‘I was told it takes about 20 shots to get the pipes clean’
‘So like 4 days?’
‘You don’t want to start too soon, you can re-arrange plumbing and spring a leak! Let your balls heal dammit… You may not need them anymore, but they are still attached.’
‘Those are rookie numbers! You gotta pump up those numbers!’
‘That be 5 sessions each day. I struggle just to floss every night y’all are wack’
‘I’ve had two tests and I’m not “cleared” 🙁
I’m close, but not quite there.
They said in rare cases, it can take up to a YEAR.
It’s weird to me that a few years ago, I got tested to make sure the factory worked, and now I’m getting tested to make sure it doesn’t. But we have our kids; they’re all we need.’’20ish shots and 2 specimens before most docs will declare a vasectomy a success. At least with me.’
‘Wow, 2 years then.’
And just in case it’s still not clear …
‘A vasectomy makes a cut in the vas deferens, the tube that carries sperm from the testicles all the way through the urethra. The cut in the vas deferens prevents new sperm coming from the testicles to the rest of the reproductive system, but the existing sperm is still present pre and post-op.
Think of it of this way. The vas deferens is like a bridge with a lot cars (i.e. sperm) on it. A vasectomy would “break” the bridge and close the ends off at the part that gets “broken” (i.e. cut). Cars on one side of the bridge (i.e. sperm in the vas deferens attached to the testicles) can’t reach the other side anymore (urethra). But, the cars that are already on the bridge can still exit on the other side (i.e. sperm in the vas deferens end not connected to the testicles and can exit through the urethra). Getting cars off the bridge, due to traffic, takes time (sperm only accounts for 2-3% of each ejaculation).’
You can read the whole Reddit thread here.
