25 funny things we’ve seen to set the weekend up nicely
So, the weekend is almost here, and aren’t we glad of it. Donald Trump told us that Hurricane Florence is tremendously wet, the two Russian suspects in the Skripal poisoning case told us that Salisbury Cathedral has a spire measuring 123m, and we were told by David Davis that they’ve solved the Irish Border problem. It’s a lot to take in, which is why we also need some light relief.
These 25 jokes and pictures are the perfect antidote to the news.
We watched this put up letter by letter from a table in a restaurant pic.twitter.com/Emox2kfSSw
— Richard Hanrahan Is Tweeting This (@TheHitch) September 12, 2018
Alan Carr is named after two types of key.
— Adam Kay (@amateuradam) September 9, 2018
To be fair it's a great film pic.twitter.com/3dyg9ncACu
— Luke M (@I_am_Lukem) September 10, 2018
Worried that I may be seeing a hypnotherapist and don't know it.
— MꙬse Allain (@MooseAllain) September 10, 2018
Me: and this is my house
Friend: what’s upstairs
Me: stairs don’t talk
— Fish Bowel (@fishbowel) September 9, 2018
Nothing makes you feel old like describing Super Ted & Spotty Man to people in their mid-twenties who claim it sounds so shit that you must have made it up. pic.twitter.com/aGpWxxcA8H
— elfie. (@elfbatross) September 10, 2018
Friend takes cat to vet. Vet takes cat's temperature rectally. Cat promptly bites friend. Vet says to friend "Oh dear, is that biting normal?"
Friend says furiously "I don't bloody know, do I, I've never shoved anything up his arse."
— Lucy Freeman (@Lucyvfreeman) September 11, 2018
When you book a room but the last meeting runs over. pic.twitter.com/fFA0DbDDoI
— Rondelle Hobbs (@RondelleHobbs) September 12, 2018
Twitter’s a great place to come when you’re second guessing everything you do in the real world and need to be reminded you also suck online.
— your mom (@eff_yeah_steph) September 11, 2018
When the pharmacist knows you too well. pic.twitter.com/kf3V4I5XJD
— Jandalize (@Jandalize) September 12, 2018
I spent nine hours watching The Wire today and to be honest I can't see what the fuss is. pic.twitter.com/2TLrcyzE2J
— Olaf Falafel (@OFalafel) September 12, 2018
– So, the chalk outline killer strikes again.
– Er, no sir, we draw those.
– Oh, yeah… of course.
— Neil (@_Enanem_) September 11, 2018