George Osborne Spends £400 Billion On Candy Crush
Economic News: Chancellor George Osborne had admitted that he accidentally spent £400 billion of the nation’s money while playing Candy Crush Saga.
It’s thought Osborne racked up the bill playing the game on his iPhone, while cowering in a toilet during a particularly harsh economic briefing.
The game is free to play, but extra lives and other options cost money – Osborne reportedly spent most of the money on buying extra turns after getting stuck on level 63. Around £50 million was then spent on a lollipop hammer.
The Chancellor apparently only noticed the massive bill when he opened iTunes, in order to put a Keane album on his iPhone.
“I can get the money back,” a clearly panicked Osborne was said to have told ministers concerned with how his addiction to combining sweets into rows has ballooned the UK’s national debt.
“We just need to turn schools into factories. App factories, making apps with expensive in-game purchases. That’s the ticket!”