‘Fastest Ever’ Xbox Allows Users To Complete Games In Five Seconds

Gaming News: Microsoft have announced details of the next generation Xbox, including a processor so fast games can be completed in under five seconds.

“The speed the Xbox One runs at is mind blowing,” said Don Mattrick, President of the Interactive Entertainment Business at Microsoft. “Thanks to some incredible new technology it will take gamers longer to get the disc out of the case than to play the game. It’s lightning fast.”

Mattrick also confirmed that the Xbox One will let users simultaneously surf the web, watch TV, DVD’s, on demand video, social networking, as well as playing two games at once.

“All of these things will be happening concurrently on the same device,” said Mattrick. “Xbox One is all about your relationship with the TV.”

“In this case it’s a relationship where your partner is a needy bastard who won’t shut the fuck up for two minutes and let you watch a film.”