Should I have an office romance?

Office Romance Special: Embarking on an office romance can be a minefield of confusion, red tape, distraction, and mess in the stationary cupboard. Corporate romance can be a thrill for all concerned, but with it comes dangers and the risk of every single one of your colleagues being given a highly detailed description of your genitalia that will haunt them forever.

Experts reckon that 70% of relationships are formed in the workplace, a statistic that concerned McDonalds so much that they plan to introduce mandatory chemical castration for all employees worldwide by 2012.

It’s a plan that many other companies are seriously considering, so chances are 2011 will be the last chance you’ll have for a guilty, hurried fumble with a lusty accountant on a photocopier.

Thankfully we’ve constructed this handy flow chart using graphics and logic to help you decide if you should embark on a torrid work-based fling, or simply be content with sitting at your desk, looking out of the window and wondering what your colleagues look like if they picked up that biro naked.

See the gory pictures of real office parties gone wrong here

Read the fantastic ‘A-Z of Office Slanguage here