Swipe left/right
The mystery of why Nigel Farage is interviewed by the BBC so often has been explained, after the discovery that the former UKIP leader has been secretly living in a ceiling crawl space at their offices.

The shocking discovery was made after the ‘strong odour of ale and fags’ was reported coming from part of the ceiling.

“It makes perfect sense,” said Farage. “Instead of getting a cab from my modest £4 million house in Chelsea to the BBC every day, I thought I’d just live there so I could immediately spout off some bollocks whenever they needed me to pretend to be the voice of the people.”

“We had to coax him out with a pint of Fursty Ferret and 20 Benson & Hedges,” said one BBC source.

“Good job we found him when we did – it seems he was living off a diet that consisted of nothing more than Mini Cheddars and bigotry. Hopefully now he’ll try and run as an MP for the eighth time and find a new burrow to live in”

 

Breaking News: This truly wonderful Roger Moore story will soothe your aching soul

Trending Now

  1. News
    This truly wonderful Roger Moore story will soothe your aching soul
  2. Weird World
    Villagers fill potholes with rubber ducks in possibly the most British protest ever
  3. Pics
    Polite message
  4. Pics
    This guy going around a museum and using FaceApp to add smiles to classical art has finally found a good use for FaceApp
  5. News
    “Top tips for men juggling a successful career and fatherhood” hilariously nails how sexist the advice given to working women is
« Swipe navigation »