Nigel Farage found ‘living in BBC ceiling crawl space’ so he can be easily interviewed every few hours
The shocking discovery was made after the ‘strong odour of ale and fags’ was reported coming from part of the ceiling.
“It makes perfect sense,” said Farage. “Instead of getting a cab from my modest £4 million house in Chelsea to the BBC every day, I thought I’d just live there so I could immediately spout off some bollocks whenever they needed me to pretend to be the voice of the people.”
“We had to coax him out with a pint of Fursty Ferret and 20 Benson & Hedges,” said one BBC source.
“Good job we found him when we did – it seems he was living off a diet that consisted of nothing more than Mini Cheddars and bigotry. Hopefully now he’ll try and run as an MP for the eighth time and find a new burrow to live in”