Leading architects condemn new tower build in Canary Wharf as looking “like a cock”

Chinese developers are planning a 67 story building in Canary Wharf that looks exactly like a penis according to leading architects.

SERIOUSLY, LOOK AT IT:

Here’s the quite dry industry news report which completely failed to mention the ridiculous shape via constructionenquirer:

Chinese get greenlight for 67-floor Canary Wharf resi tower

Chinese developer Greenland Group has got the planning thumbs up from the London Borough of Tower Hamlets to build a 67-floor residential skyscraper at the western end of the north dock in Canary Wharf.

Poke staff figured let’s show this to some architects to make sure our eyes aren’t deceiving us.

(Interestingly no one would go on the record unless we promised anonymity, “it’d piss off too many clients – Canary Wharf, those developers etc etc.”)

SO a leading London architect confirmed:

Good grief, it’s a skyward advertisement for Genitalia.

This is why it’s important to review 3D modelling of a building WELL before deciding to go public.

It’s bad enough that it has a passing resemblance to a penis, but to angle it upwards so that it looks like it’s got a semi is quite the achievement.

We then spoke to a second architect who gave us a slightly more considered opinion but still confirmed the essential penis-y nature of the building:

It looks like a cock.

Seriously though, there’s a lot of subconscious penis-ey stuff in building big towers. It’s refreshing to see a plan reflecting this as well as the elevations.

See also Robert Venturi’s essay on Learning From Las Vegas, which classifies all buildings into Ducks and Decorated Sheds. First is the shape of the thing that it wants to be, second is a box with a few decorations that customise it.

This tower is definitely a Duck

If you ever wanted confirmation that Canary Wharf is full of huge dicks then the proof is right here.