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EU to build giant sandbox for people to bury their heads in over migrant crisis

Ambitious plans have been announced to build a sandbox large enough for every EU citizen to bury their heads in over the migrant crisis.

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It’s estimated that more than 700,000 migrants have crossed to Europe by boat so far this year and the EU says that the new ‘Ostrich Approach Initiative’ will ease the suffering of millions of Europeans who haven’t the faintest idea of how to deal with the crisis.

“Previously we urged people to put their fingers in their ears and say ‘la la la la la I can’t hear you’ whenever anyone mentioned Syria, the Mediterranean or boats, though this had mixed results,” said a EU spokesman.

“But when construction of the sandbox is complete, people across Europe will finally be able to take definitive action over the plight of these refugees.”

“We all know that burying your head in the sand until a problem goes away always works terrifically well – this is just a scaled up version of that. Plus it will also provide somewhere for cats to take a shit.”