Terrible Real Estate Agent PhotographsÂ is a Tumblr by Andy Donaldson devoted to â€śinexplicably bad property photographs.”
Here are some of the many, many highlights;
2. ‘Of the two options, â€śbless this houseâ€ť is the more popular.’
3. ‘A tragic scene. This is what happens when a smurf bursts.’
4. ‘Some awful things must have happened on this toilet for the owners to have erected tidal defences.’
5.Â The agents are quietly confident that a recent missing persons case is on the verge of being solved.
6. ‘Potential buyers are advised not to think about what happens in this room when your back is turned and the light begins to fade.’
7. ‘For a variety of reasons, this is one shower that should be checked thoroughly before use.’
8. ‘Despite the best efforts of the authorities, occassionally an inmate will manage to list his cell on the open market.’
9. ‘Some people like to read while on the toilet. Others prefer to be inundated by multiple confusing and contradictory reflections of themselves, repeating into infinity.’
11. ‘The slow death of the remaining pot-plants has been thoroughly enjoyed by the current owners.’
12. ‘The owners assure us the pool will be dredged before anyone else can move in.’
13. ‘The property has been recently upgraded to withstand the forthcoming zombie apocalypse.’
14. ‘Jean-Paul Sartre said â€śhell is other peopleâ€ť. It is not. Hell is this patio.’
15. ‘Never again will you miss a delivery because you were on the toilet’
16. ‘On a cold winterâ€™s night, thereâ€™s nothing quite like a poorly executed drawing of a log fire.’
17. ‘A rare example of what architectural historians refer to as a â€śfertility windowâ€ť.
18. ‘To ward off potential intruders the owners have put a fully stocked drinks trolly immediately in front of a badly-fitted glass door.
19. ‘Despite modernisation, the owners have retained the toiletâ€™s original listening booth – an unusual feature seldom seen nowadays.’
20. ‘Furnished. Particularly well-suited to the hosting of competitive staring or arm-wrestling tournaments.’
and now available forÂ pre-order on Amazon.
Artist creates giant portrait of Jack Bauer using London postcards