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Terrible Real Estate Agent Photographs is a Tumblr by Andy Donaldson devoted to “inexplicably bad property photographs.”

Here are some of the many, many highlights;

1. ‘Reminiscent of the bathrooms in the Palace of Versailles, if the bathrooms in the Palace of Versailles had been decorated on a tight budget in the 1970s.’
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2. ‘Of the two options, “bless this house” is the more popular.’

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3. ‘A tragic scene. This is what happens when a smurf bursts.’

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4. ‘Some awful things must have happened on this toilet for the owners to have erected tidal defences.’

A new kind of bidet?

5. The agents are quietly confident that a recent missing persons case is on the verge of being solved.

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6. ‘Potential buyers are advised not to think about what happens in this room when your back is turned and the light begins to fade.’

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7. ‘For a variety of reasons, this is one shower that should be checked thoroughly before use.’

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8. ‘Despite the best efforts of the authorities, occassionally an inmate will manage to list his cell on the open market.’

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9. ‘Some people like to read while on the toilet. Others prefer to be inundated by multiple confusing and contradictory reflections of themselves, repeating into infinity.’

tumblr_n3og5yIbDF1rrqskho1_50010. ‘What does the fox say? It says “I’m the size of a fully grown man, I can stand upright, and I’m not even 100% sure I’m a fox”.’

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11. ‘The slow death of the remaining pot-plants has been thoroughly enjoyed by the current owners.’

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12. ‘The owners assure us the pool will be dredged before anyone else can move in.’

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13. ‘The property has been recently upgraded to withstand the forthcoming zombie apocalypse.’

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14. ‘Jean-Paul Sartre said “hell is other people”. It is not. Hell is this patio.’

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15. ‘Never again will you miss a delivery because you were on the toilet’

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16. ‘On a cold winter’s night, there’s nothing quite like a poorly executed drawing of a log fire.’

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17. ‘A rare example of what architectural historians refer to as a “fertility window”.

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18. ‘To ward off potential intruders the owners have put a fully stocked drinks trolly immediately in front of a badly-fitted glass door.

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19. ‘Despite modernisation, the owners have retained the toilet’s original listening booth – an unusual feature seldom seen nowadays.’

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20. ‘Furnished. Particularly well-suited to the hosting of competitive staring or arm-wrestling tournaments.’

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and now available for pre-order on Amazon.

follow @BadRealtyPhotos

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