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12 Extremely Useful Pet Products

One of the very best things about owning a pet is the sheer number of fun, expensive products that are available to help you really appreciate your furry friend. Many of these products work by neutralising the unpleasant aspects of pet ownership; such as playing with them, feeding them, looking at them or taking them for a walk.

There are literally billions of different pet accessories and products available. Whether you want to turn your dog into a fashion accessory, make your cat look like a stripper or put a very small hat on a frog, there’s a shop out there just waiting to take your money.

1. Dog beak muzzle.

Do you wish that science would hurry up and create a duck-dog hybrid? Or do you simply want to disguise your dog as a duck at the park in order to get free bread? If so, this novelty dog muzzle is perfect for you.

2. Cat exercise wheel.

If you’re a cat owner with a huge house and more money than sense, you should definitely spend $500 on this amazing cat exercise wheel, which your cat won’t use because it’s a cat. If you’re lucky, it might decide to play with the box the exercise wheel comes in. It probably won’t, though.

3. Rear Gear butt covers.

Via Etsy

Via Etsy

Picture the scene: you spend ages shopping for the prettiest and most fashionable dog on the market, then you realise that you can see its anus. Nightmare! Thankfully, a genius at the crafting site Etsy has come up with the perfect solution: clip on bumhole covers guaranteed to obscure the unpalatable sight of your dog’s rear end.

4. Dog tattoos.

Do you often look at your dog and wish it had words on it? Have you taken it to your local tattoo parlour and been turned away? Don’t worry, there’s a solution. You can buy temporary spray on tattoos for your pet that are guaranteed to turn any dog into a weird looking walking billboard.

5. DJ Cat scratching pad.

Who cares that this product takes up most of your floor space, or that it’s designed in a way that makes it quite hard for a cat to actually use? It makes Chairman Meow look like a tiny DJ whenever he stands next to it! Just imagine how cool your Instagram feed is going to look from now on. Amazeballs.

6. Dog sex toy.

This dog-shaped sex toy (complete with a handy hole at the back) is an amazing way to prevent your horny pet humping the furniture. Unless you consider a £140 dog sculpture furniture, of course- in which case he’s still humping the furniture.

7. Rat clothes.

Tired of people saying ‘Argh! A rat!’ whenever they see your pet? Dress him or her in a crocheted pink cape and weird droopy wizard hat. Instead of being repelled, your friends and family will simply assume that they’re hallucinating due to a drug overdose or nervous breakdown.

8. Dogbrella.

Everyone knows that dogs aren’t naturally waterproof. That’s why you- and every other dog owner on the planet- should buy a dogbrella. In fact, why not buy two or three for added protection?

9. Kitty wigs.

Have you ever found yourself muttering the phrase: “I love my cat, but I wish he looked more like Lady Gaga”? If so, you’re in for a real treat. With Kittywigs, you can turn any cat into Lady Gaga for only $50 (plus postage and packaging).

10. Pootrap.

“Pootrap: for people who shouldn’t own dogs in the first place.”

11. Goldfish walker.

Your goldfish might have a three second memory, poor eyesight and no real way to appreciate or understand its surroundings, but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t take him or her for a walk. And now (thanks to Huddersfield metalworker-slash-inventor Mick Madden) you can!

12. Hats for amphibians.

Via Etsy

Via Etsy

The real question is: why wouldn’t you put a hat on your toad? It’s basically a no-brainer.

By Hilary Wardle

► 15 MORE amazing dog accessories here