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Health News: The beleaguered NHS 111 helpline service has been sending people pizza, instead of giving them medical advice, it has emerged.

The head of the Royal College of Nursing said parts of the service had descended into chaos and that 111 phoneline staff had received so little training they thought they were working at a pizza shop – or even worse, as double glazing salespeople.

“I called 111 and 45 minutes later a man was at my door handing me a twelve inch pepperoni pizza,” said one baffled pensioner who had called the service to ask about acute back pain. “Obviously it made me feel better, but only for a short time.”

Another claimed they had phoned up about a persistent cough they’d had for several weeks and were instead offered a better deal on their mobile phone contract.

“It’s almost like you can’t run a medical helpline with unqualified staff,” said one senior Minister. “It might serve as a warning about privatising the whole of the NHS, but thankfully I love money too much to worry about that. Plus I’m on Bupa.”

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