Queen ‘Using Illness To Catch Up On The Wire Box Sets’

Royal News: The Queen is taking advantage of her recent illness to finally catch up with the last three series of acclaimed crime drama The Wire.

Her Majesty recently cancelled several engagements after she was admitted to hospital for treatment of the symptoms of gastroenteritis earlier this month.

Sources inside Buckingham Palace say she put on episode one of the third series of the show merely to ‘pass some time’, but has since been watching them back-to-back. It’s thought she strongly relates to the character of Stringer Bell, and his attempts to reform his criminal organisation.

“To be honest I think she’s just using the gastroenteritis to get out of going to boring events in draughty old buildings,” said a Palace spokesman.

“If anyone asks how she’s doing, she lets out this fake-sounding, weak little cough and says ‘Still feeling a bit poorly. Do us a favour and pop another DVD in the player’.  Then every once in a while I’ll hear a yell of ‘Omar comin!’ from the Royal chambers.”