Swipe left/right

Motoring News: Arsehole drivers are to get their own dedicated lane on motorways, in order to give everyone else who doesn’t drive like a total prick a break.

“The new dedicated arsehole lane will give arsehole drivers ample opportunity to drive really close to each other, blare their horns for no apparent reason and cut each other up all they want,” said a spokesman for the Highways Agency.

The plan is predicted to cost billions of pounds, but the government says it will be worth it when these twats have their own private lane to act the prick in.

“Anybody wearing a baseball cap backwards and driving a Renault Clio with alloys and tinted windows will automatically qualify for use of the new lane,” said the Highways Agency.

“Likewise businessmen who blare their horns at anyone doing less than 70 mph will also qualify. Let’s hope they kill each other.”

 

Video Of The Day: #sponsored

Trending Now

  1. Pics
    How To Reply To A Wrong Number
  2. Pics
    This guy is making the London Tube Map more honest (and funny too)
  3. News
    12 funny Brexit tweets that will make you laugh or sob into your pillow crying
  4. Pics
    How to visit Game of Thrones in real life
  5. Exclusive
    Boris Johnson’s Brexit Facebook page
« Swipe navigation »