Swipe left/right

Supermarket news: A 38-year old man has been dramatically rescued from his local ASDA megastore after frantically wandering up and down the aisles looking for his wife for three days.

Niall Cook and his wife Debbie had visited the megastore in Roehampton, South West London to do their weekly shopping, when Mr Cook wandered off to find some ‘cheap meat’.

“God knows what I was thinking of,” said Mr Cook as he recovered in hospital. “Looking back it was a stupid, reckless thing to do. I just thought I’d have a look at the meat on my own for once.”

“I was only gone for a minute or two and got scared so I went to look for Debbie. I couldn’t find her and panicked a bit before remembering something I’d seen on a survival show. I decided to walk down the centre aisle and methodically look from left to right.”

“I couldn’t find her anywhere. I wandered up and down, left and right for what seemed like hours. I became desperate and so curled up in ball next to the shampoo, like I do at home.”

Mr Cook was eventually rescued 2 days later.

A spokesman for Queen Mary’s hospital, Roehampton said “We’ve seen a massive increase in incidents of this kind since the introduction of 24hr Megastores.”

“The man gets separated from the woman, becomes disoriented by row upon row of brightly coloured tins and loses track of time because the store never closes. In the old days they’d only been lost for a few hours. Now it’s days. We strongly urge men not to wander off on their own in supermarkets as the risks are simply too great.”

Story: wOz

 

Video Of The Day: Mechanics create an impressive portrait of Queen made from 900 car parts #sponsored

Trending Now

  1. Weird World
    Bored businessman makes ridiculous requests to hotel staff to pass the time
  2. News
    People are sharing “hilarious jokes that a few seconds to get” and they’re very amusing indeed
  3. uncategorised
    How this Australian newspaper announced Benedict Cumberbatch’s engagement is hilarious
  4. News
    This couple booked a room on AIRBnB and “walked into a porn shoot”
  5. uncategorised
    Naughty scamps have overrun David Cameron’s #VoteConservative hashtag and it’s hilarious
« Swipe navigation »