Tech News: Steve Ballmer, the CEO of Microsoft, has promised to track down the last remaining user of web browser Internet Explorer so he can apologise to them personally.

“When I find out who they are I will visit them in person,” said Ballmer. “I will sit down with them and offer a heartfelt apology. Since 1995 Internet Explorer has been our baby and like a lot of things from 1995 – for example the music of The Dandy Warhols and the movie Batman Forever – it hasn’t aged well.”

Ballmer announced the apology after the German government urged users to not use Explorer due to security flaws and a general stink of shit about the browser.

It’s the second warning the German government has issued against Internet Explorer – in 2010 it issued the same warning after a senior politician hung himself when the browser gave him multiple ‘unexpected error’ messages while trying to upload a single photo to Facebook.

Story: Simon Swatman

T-Shirt Of The Week > Get One Here image_16353_1_195315_1_38903_1_48_1_532034-1

Leave a Reply

3 Responses

  • Michael

    Internet Exporer was perfect and worked well until the Apolo 14 launch, certain software to control the guildance system were fed to JPL via the net. In doing so a few “not many” gigtoms remained in the explorer system and it is this that has given internet explorer in secure access to many. Nasa have been trying to retreive the gigtoms but as yet with no success, news from JPL indidcate that the gigtoms are in fact multipling and breaking into many coded messages. More later as it comes in.

    September 21, 2012 at 8:27 am
  • Rob Allport

    Why haven’t the UK Government done this yet?

    September 22, 2012 at 10:26 am
  • Colin Jones

    Perhaps the UK hasn’t done it yet because the Conservatives are trying to recruit Microsoft UK as a party donor?

    September 22, 2012 at 7:33 pm