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Twat News: Police admitted they are unable to arrest all the mouthy pricks on social media sites, due to a lack of manpower and how depressed they get after talking to these twats.

“There is legislation which concerns causing harassment, alarm or distress – but the law is more vague when it comes to just being an unpleasant little turd,” said a spokesman for the Police Federation.

“If we arrest one jumped-up, ranting little tosspot on Facebook or Twitter for being shitty to a celebrity or teenage diver, we’d have to arrest all of them. It’d be easier to build a wall around the U.K and turn it into a prison.”

The Police Federation also cited how depressed officers get after interviewing cocky little turds who mouth off on the internet.

“It gets me down thinking these people will have kids of their own, who will also grow up to be wholesale pricks,” said one officer. “It was much better in the pre-internet days when people weren’t so comment-happy.”

“Back then we all knew that no-one gave two shits about your feeble fucking opinions, so we kept our mouths shut.”

Story: Simon Swatman


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