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Food News: Ahead of the Diamond Jubilee Stakes on Saturday, McDonalds have unveiled their latest burger – made from the flesh of euthanised horses that had to be put down after the race.

The McAscot boasts ‘a sesame seed bun with lettuce, onions, pickles, cheese and a 100% horse meat patty’ and is garnished with the kind of stupid fucking hat Royal Ascot is famous for. Diners can then wash the horse-burger down with a limited edition strawberry and Pimm’s milkshake.

“Our food is all about quality and freshness,” said McDonalds UK spokesman Karl Drais. “You can’t get higher quality than a thoroughbred stallion – and what could be fresher than a patty made from a horse that was put down half an hour ago because it broke all its legs running a race?”

“This is a burger that is truly locally sourced. We get all the meat from around the back of the stables.”

If the McAscot proves popular with racegoers, McDonalds have said they will consider extending the range to other sporting events – they are currently developing a McWimbledon, made from the meat of dead ballboys that Andy Murray has beaten to death in a fit of self-hatred and frustration.

Story+Image: Simon Swatman


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