Swipe left/right

Porn News: An ardent fan of watching pornography on his 42” TV isn’t such a fan of closing his curtains while doing so, according to his neighbours.

Mick Harris, 47, from Peckham, London, lives on the third floor of a block of flats and it’s estimated that around 40 of his neighbours inadvertently view his nightly pornography marathons.

“Thank God he sits in the dark when he watches porn,” said one neighbour. “If he had the lights on as well as the curtains open I might accidentally catch a glimpse of him tugging away when I do the washing up. I’d probably never go in my kitchen again, just in case.”

Concerned neighbours have considered asking Harris to shut his curtains, but find broaching the topic with him deeply uncomfortable – plus he looks unnerving similar to Phil Harding from Time Team.

“I honestly don’t know what to say to him,” said another neighbour. “Although I saw him fast forwarding through a brutal-looking fisting scene when I looked out of the window the other night, so I know he’s not a total monster.”

Story: Simon Swatman

Breaking News: The instructions for this pound shop mobile phone case are the best thing you'll read today

 

Trending Now

  1. Pics
    This woman’s awkward “automatically generated email address” has gone viral with 50,000 retweets
  2. Pics
    This guy will fix problems in your photos for free and the results are simply astonishing
  3. Pics
    19 awful estate agent photographs that’ll make you glad you can’t afford to buy a house anyway because they’re all terrible
  4. Pics
    The instructions for this pound shop mobile phone case are the best thing you’ll read today
  5. Pics
    “This might be the most British video ever”
« Swipe navigation »