Swipe left/right

Summer News: A wasp found itself incapable of flying out of an open fucking window earlier today, despite having gained access to the living room when the fucking window was only slightly ajar.

Frustrated resident Craig Hardbrew, 29, opened the fucking window when he first spotted the wasp, hoping it would be able to fly outside unaided. “It just kept on flying into the other pane of glass,” said Hardbrew.

“I opened that fucking window all the way, but no – it didn’t want to fly outside, it just kept on bashing its head against the pane. Stupid fucking wasp.”

Hardbrew is then said to have rolled up a copy of The Sun and used it to try and gently nudge the wasp out of the open fucking window, but with no success.

After a last-ditch attempt to prompt the wasp into leaving, Hardbrew is then said to have used the newspaper to kill the wasp, with no lasting feelings of guilt.

Story: Simon Swatman

 

Breaking News: 'So is this the sort of stuff they teach at church now?'

Trending Now

  1. Pics
    Competition result to name this pond even better than Boaty McBoatface
  2. News
    These messages between a guy and a woman on Tinder go wrong in a brilliant way
  3. Pics
    This guy makes post-it notes that perfectly sum up adulthood
  4. News
    An Irish Pagan society had some great advice for some homophobic, racist US Pagans
  5. Pics
    People are sharing “thoughts they’ve had in the shower” and they’re great
« Swipe navigation »