Jubilee News: Transport For London came under fire today as politicians, royalists and the Daily Mail branded their latest Jubilee Line station redesign as ‘an act of gross disrespect’.
“To decorate the trains in order to celebrate this great national occasion is one thing,” thundered Peter Hitchens in his column, “but to have the public actually dispatched into the Queen’s mouth, without even wiping their feet, is totally beyond the pale.”
The new Westminster station tunnel design was unveiled yesterday, but has already been covered over ‘to prevent any further misunderstanding’.
“We apologise for any offence caused,” said Stacy Ruthers, spokeswoman for TFL.
“We hoped that the public would appreciate the platform redesign as a bit of fairground fun. If, however, they feel they are actually being swallowed and digested by Her Majesty, the royal enzymes slowly breaking down their clothes, skin, hair and flesh, only for their remains to then be defecated out further along the tracks, then obviously that’s the wrong message.”
Story: Jasper Gibson