Music News: Britainâ€™s Best Band Coldplay today announced a historic 30-date tour of the nationâ€™s biggest supermarkets.
Speaking after the Brits this week, where they won the award for â€˜Music to Calm Pets Withâ€™ in the Music Like A Humming Fridge category, singer Chris Martin told a packed press conference: â€˜Supermarkets are where our music really belongs.’
‘Fans are used to Tesco and Asda playing our songs, unless itâ€™s the Christmas period obviously. But now they can have the pure experience of hearing us how we are meant to be heard, uninterrupted by tannoy announcements.â€™
The rock legends, whose album â€˜Hopes + Generalised Dreams = Harmonious Soundwavesâ€™ is released next week, will see their tour culminate at Salfordâ€™s massive Tesco Extra.
â€˜Thereâ€™s 185,000 square feet of floor space in that one,â€™ sang Martin in his beautiful sonorous cascade. He then switched his piano to Lazer.
Tesco chief-exec Philip Clarke said, â€˜It is expected that Coldplay will bring to the retail space a sense of prevalent hopefulness.’
‘A consumer will see our mile-long, 7ft-high stack of chocolate biscuits and their spirits will lift, but then, before their spirits crash back to earth with the sudden despair that pushing a trolley round a supermarket on Friday nights brings, Coldplay will come over the speakers and make them feel positive.’
‘In fact as the rock-godsâ€™ music ascends towards the poignant arcs that made them famous, the consumer then feels anything is possible. It then buys more biscuits than it can ever eat.â€™
The ambient megabandâ€™s tour, â€˜The Locally Sourced Organic Foodstuffs Tourâ€™, includes Cleethorpes, Newcastle, and Liverpool. Coldplay bassist Guy Berryman said, â€˜Most of the really huge stores might be in the north but itâ€™s not our business to investigate any socio-economic reasons behind industrial-scale comfort eating. Itâ€™s our business to rock the place out!â€™
Story: Adam Bailey
Image: Simon Swatman